As the events of yesterday unfolded with the shooting at the War Memorial, I found myself glued to my computer monitoring 5 news agencies and obsessively refreshing my Twitter page to keep abreast of the situation. I found myself consumed with the details, getting the latest footage, and sharing the updates with a few people with whom I was in contact.
And I prayed. Breathless, Disjointed. Uncertain prayers.
Today, feeling saturated with all of it, I started out today avoiding Twitter and Facebook.
Then I panicked! WHAT IF! What if something happened and I wasn't online to pray about it? What if people I know are in danger and I didn't have any idea? How was God going to know what to do without my prayer..........
In that moment, I was reminded of a lesson I learned a number of years ago while I was overseas. One of my best friends told me that she lost two grandparents within the space of 2 weeks. I was BESIDE myself. I was ready to resign my contract, pack my bags and go home. Though I would lose out on a once-in-a-lifetime experience my sense of responsibility I felt required me to make that sacrifice.
And then there was a moment...
I don't often think that God has spoken directly to me but this time I'm pretty sure if you had been in the room, you would have heard His voice too. It came in the form of a question "Laura, you can't bring them back to life so what are you going to do?" In a moment of clarity, and frustration, I realized this was a convealsrsation that was going to change my life. I responded "no, I can't bring them back, but I can Hug her, minister to her and pray for her. She NEEDS me!"
Oh how wrong I was.
In that gently firm way of God, the response was "really? She NEEDS you?! Don't you trust that I knew this was going to happen? Don't you trust that I knew she would need someone to hug her, and minister to her? I have people in place for that, no need to rush home, The one thing you can do from anywhere is Pray, then trust me for the rest."
This moment broke my heart as I realized indeed I had taken on this idea (and burden) that if I didn't pray it wouldn't happen. I had experienced theological "mission creep" Somehow, the amazing belief that prayer changes things so we must engage events around us in prayer had "crept" into my heart as a responsibility for the events around me.
In this moment I realized I had become arrogant in my prayers.
In the following months I watched from afar as people I love were diagnosed with Cancer, Diabetes, almost died in childbirth, and walked through the pain of losing a child. Equally difficult has been the good times I have been unable to attend: graduations, birthdays, weddings, and school recitals,
Each of these moments reminds me that I am not in charge of the world (I need reminding of that pretty often!), and as much as I love those around me, and they love me, in those moments what they need more than anything is God, only He can truly give them what they need.
I will still pray as though my words have the power of life and death in them, but I am duly reminded that at the end of the day, it isn't about my prayers, its about God's sovereignty.
Thursday, October 23, 2014
The importance of Remembering.
Wow! It's be a long time since I posted here. But for some reason the events of the last week have needed more of an outlet than Facebook or Twitter will allow for.
We are a nation in mourning, we are a nation shaken from our beliefs that bad things happen "over there". Regardless of whether "over there" is a desert 8000 km from home or a 2 hour flight south to the US, these things don't happen to us, in our hometown.
Except they do. Over the past 24 hours since the shooting at the National War Memorial and the Parliamentary lock down, we have been reminded that these things can and do indeed happen in Canada - except we forget. Ask a 20-something to tell you about the FLQ crisis, or gas rationing, or even more recently the time a car thought to be filled with explosives was parked on Parliament Hill and you will likely be met with a confused look.
Ask these same young adults if they recall a time when the public could drive onto parliament hill and, if you were feeling lucky, might even park-risking a parking ticket- to be closer to the market. This is a generation with no living memory of things that we who are older remember fondly. We remember a time pre 9/11 when the coolest way to get from Nicholas St to Colonel By Drive was via Tunnel UNDER DND headquarters. And yet, even we who do remember, we also learned the hard way.
Every generation needs the memory of the generation before to ensure we know the whole story.
This is especially seen at Remembrance Day, When we stand side by side with those who remember things we cannot possibly remember ourselves.
This is the value of tradition and historical aspects of our instiutions.
I must admit, prior to yesterday I simply didn't know what the role Parliament's Sergeant-at-Arms held. Like many I forgot to look past the trappings the quaint robe (silently wondering who rid the role of a powdered wig) and the massive Mace (what is a Mace anyway?) and understand. We often fail to see that the pomp and circumstance is not just for fun. It all has a purpose, sure, maybe some of those purposes are outdated and no longer needed (like the two-sword's length separation between the opposition benches to avoid bloodshed in Parliament) but that doesn't mean they ought to be abandoned for the sake of modernity.
This tragic day reminds us, that we are one of the 'big kids' in global politics, that we have a sophisticated and capable response framework that keeps us safe.
I think its extraordinarily Canadian that one of the main goals of our heroic Sergeant-at-Arms is to protect unobtrusively. I suspect many Canadians were surprised at the speed and sheer volume of response to the threat simply because we don't show our might the same way others do.
I am a prouder Canadian today than I was yesterday- and that's saying something!
We are a nation in mourning, we are a nation shaken from our beliefs that bad things happen "over there". Regardless of whether "over there" is a desert 8000 km from home or a 2 hour flight south to the US, these things don't happen to us, in our hometown.
Except they do. Over the past 24 hours since the shooting at the National War Memorial and the Parliamentary lock down, we have been reminded that these things can and do indeed happen in Canada - except we forget. Ask a 20-something to tell you about the FLQ crisis, or gas rationing, or even more recently the time a car thought to be filled with explosives was parked on Parliament Hill and you will likely be met with a confused look.
Ask these same young adults if they recall a time when the public could drive onto parliament hill and, if you were feeling lucky, might even park-risking a parking ticket- to be closer to the market. This is a generation with no living memory of things that we who are older remember fondly. We remember a time pre 9/11 when the coolest way to get from Nicholas St to Colonel By Drive was via Tunnel UNDER DND headquarters. And yet, even we who do remember, we also learned the hard way.
Every generation needs the memory of the generation before to ensure we know the whole story.
This is especially seen at Remembrance Day, When we stand side by side with those who remember things we cannot possibly remember ourselves.
This is the value of tradition and historical aspects of our instiutions.
I must admit, prior to yesterday I simply didn't know what the role Parliament's Sergeant-at-Arms held. Like many I forgot to look past the trappings the quaint robe (silently wondering who rid the role of a powdered wig) and the massive Mace (what is a Mace anyway?) and understand. We often fail to see that the pomp and circumstance is not just for fun. It all has a purpose, sure, maybe some of those purposes are outdated and no longer needed (like the two-sword's length separation between the opposition benches to avoid bloodshed in Parliament) but that doesn't mean they ought to be abandoned for the sake of modernity.
This tragic day reminds us, that we are one of the 'big kids' in global politics, that we have a sophisticated and capable response framework that keeps us safe.
I think its extraordinarily Canadian that one of the main goals of our heroic Sergeant-at-Arms is to protect unobtrusively. I suspect many Canadians were surprised at the speed and sheer volume of response to the threat simply because we don't show our might the same way others do.
I am a prouder Canadian today than I was yesterday- and that's saying something!
Monday, May 14, 2012
Halting an Advancing Threat
I found this draft of a posting I wrote in the winter, when the Shafia family murder trials were taking place. Four years ago, I would never have been able to articulate a position beyond: that is different and scary... let's oppose it. Yet I have been in areas of the world where Sharia law is lived out, even if just behind closed doors. While I cannot claim to be an expert in the things of Justice, Law, or Culture, I see an approaching threat
Recently, the media in Canada has been focussed on the results of one criminal trial. The Canadian Justice system, has in recent times, let us down in massive ways. If you speak to almost any Canadian, they have experienced, or know someone who have experiences a massive miscarriage of justice. So, when the parents and oldest child stood accused of killing 4 female members of their family, it felt like a litmus test of one of the istitutions that we put so much faith in, whether that faith is deserved or not.
Recently, the media in Canada has been focussed on the results of one criminal trial. The Canadian Justice system, has in recent times, let us down in massive ways. If you speak to almost any Canadian, they have experienced, or know someone who have experiences a massive miscarriage of justice. So, when the parents and oldest child stood accused of killing 4 female members of their family, it felt like a litmus test of one of the istitutions that we put so much faith in, whether that faith is deserved or not.
For most Canadians, the shocking nature of the crimes being tried, this is an open and shut case. A watershed moment where we all get to stand unified against "evil" at its very core.
What made this case different however, was the additional layer of faith and a culture that is so alien to our way of life. The question of "honour killing" is one being faced all over the world. Christine Blatchford's article in the Ottawa Citizen (http://www.ottawacitizen.com/news/Blatchford+heart+Shafia+trial+very+notion+what+girl/6069462/story.html) addresses the new trend being seen by the UN.
As we awaited the verdict from this trial, there was much talk about what a "not guilty" would mean for the agenda of Islam. Those who wish to see Sharia law throughout the world, could have pointed to this case as a precedent and left the unintended impression that Canadians implicitly endorse the application of Sharia Law within our boarders.
As the nation held its breath, I found myself praying for those on the jury who would be making this historical decision. I knew that too short a deliberation time, could result in cries of Pre-judgement and snap decisions. Too long deliberating could be construed as proof that this topic is worth the time of instensive debate, and that perhaps the public is divided. Without a unified viewpoint, the door is left open for the proponents of Sharia Law to forward their agenda.
Happliy, the perpetrators of the horrific crimes were found guilty and for now the worldview that would say killing a woman for her conduct is "honourable" has been held at bay. In this country though, we are still vulnerable.
I see within Canada especially an identity crisis in the area of gender. We have, to quote a good friend, thrown out the baby with the bathwater when it comes to gender rights and equality. In the midst of the debate and push for what we all believe is right (equality) we have forgotten about gender distinctives. That we are different, and our difference are meant to be complimentary to one another and celebrated. Instead, we have lost in some ways, the freedom to even have an opinion. So it leaves us vulnerable. If Canadians won't define our gender identities, others may come in, and through vociforous debate, lobbying or other means, create a situation where decisions must be made and if we don't have a strong position to vocalize, we may lose our place at the table where the decisions are made.
Part of my grand adventure took me to Nepal. One of the obeservations that we made when we were there was the ease with which men and women interacted with one another. There are such well defined gender roles that it removes much of the angst between the genders. While I don't necessarily agree with their definitions of the genders, I see the value in a common understanding.
Saturday, May 12, 2012
Grand Adventures
Life is a Grand Adventure! Everyday we wake up with new mercies and a clean slate. Sometimes, in the midst of our messy lives, those clean slates don't feel so clean, we don't see the opportunity, we hold onto what we recall was written yesterday, last year, or in our youth. Sometimes, to embrace the daily clean slate of following Christ, we must physically change our location, we must go so that we can return.
I have been on a Grand Adventure. Like any good adventure there was drama, some danger, uncertainty. There were times of fear, and those moments where you look at your fellow travellers breathless and think "how did we come out of that unscathed?" There were heroes, villains, damsels in distress and sidekicks, and I have been each of those in different measure at different moments. There are stories to tell, stories that cannot be shared, and stories that mustn't be told especially with my mother in the room. Some experiences are easy to relate, others difficult and more than a few cannot be communicate with words, they have taken up residence in my soul and have changed me forever. There has been joy, laughter, tears, heartache and love. And I am thankful!
For the last four years I have been experiencing things in life that I never thought possible. more airports that I can count, more cities I ever imagined, more people from more places doing amazing (and not so amazing) things. My life has been enriched and changed and challenged.
It has not been without cost. I have missed more birthdays, special moments, quiet times and firsts than my heart will let me contemplate. I have had to watch from afar as friends and family suffered loss, heartache and even joy without me. I am not as naive about the world as I was, with more information comes deeper burdens. I care about things and causes and situations more than I ever did. I have lost much of my innocence. I have seen the twisting of details in news stories and the mis-representation of facts to serve an agenda. I have missed countless moments of meeting needs and coming through for. But in there too there has been a lesson.
I needed to learn that I am not the giver of support and life, (God and I had an argument where He ended up asking... can you do brain surgery? That is the only thing that is needed right now.... no? OK stay put, I've got this!) the people who don't stick around, they didn't love you anyway, and maybe, just maybe there are some you didn't understand the depth of their love for you until you go away, and they stay. I learned not to be responsible for others' responses or reactions. And I learned that when you do cool stuff with your life, people make all sorts of assumptions, they fill in details with things that they have long been dreaming about!
The biggest cost to my Grand Adventure (apart from the 100's of hours stuck in airports all over the world that look alike) has been the fragmentation which has occurred. With four years of not knowing what 3 months from any moment will hold, it makes it hard to commit, invest or serve.
It seems I am home for the summer, and already I can see that I am home in more ways than just physically present. I have signed up for commitments at church, almost joined a softball league (am going to go to all the games and cheer them on-playing when they are shorthanded) and for the first time in four years, I am going to work here in my home city! So much has changed in me, and in the world around me. I wouldn't trade it for the world, but now, like any good adventure that comes to and end, it is time to unpack, sort through the souvenirs, and check to see what the mailman has dropped off while I was away!
I will endeavour to blog regularly through the summer, and as I 'unpack' I will share with you as much as I can about what I have brought home with me from my adventures.
Its good to be home!
I have been on a Grand Adventure. Like any good adventure there was drama, some danger, uncertainty. There were times of fear, and those moments where you look at your fellow travellers breathless and think "how did we come out of that unscathed?" There were heroes, villains, damsels in distress and sidekicks, and I have been each of those in different measure at different moments. There are stories to tell, stories that cannot be shared, and stories that mustn't be told especially with my mother in the room. Some experiences are easy to relate, others difficult and more than a few cannot be communicate with words, they have taken up residence in my soul and have changed me forever. There has been joy, laughter, tears, heartache and love. And I am thankful!
For the last four years I have been experiencing things in life that I never thought possible. more airports that I can count, more cities I ever imagined, more people from more places doing amazing (and not so amazing) things. My life has been enriched and changed and challenged.
 |
| These boats ferry worshippers out to an island temple -Pokura, Nepal |
I needed to learn that I am not the giver of support and life, (God and I had an argument where He ended up asking... can you do brain surgery? That is the only thing that is needed right now.... no? OK stay put, I've got this!) the people who don't stick around, they didn't love you anyway, and maybe, just maybe there are some you didn't understand the depth of their love for you until you go away, and they stay. I learned not to be responsible for others' responses or reactions. And I learned that when you do cool stuff with your life, people make all sorts of assumptions, they fill in details with things that they have long been dreaming about!
The biggest cost to my Grand Adventure (apart from the 100's of hours stuck in airports all over the world that look alike) has been the fragmentation which has occurred. With four years of not knowing what 3 months from any moment will hold, it makes it hard to commit, invest or serve.
It seems I am home for the summer, and already I can see that I am home in more ways than just physically present. I have signed up for commitments at church, almost joined a softball league (am going to go to all the games and cheer them on-playing when they are shorthanded) and for the first time in four years, I am going to work here in my home city! So much has changed in me, and in the world around me. I wouldn't trade it for the world, but now, like any good adventure that comes to and end, it is time to unpack, sort through the souvenirs, and check to see what the mailman has dropped off while I was away!
I will endeavour to blog regularly through the summer, and as I 'unpack' I will share with you as much as I can about what I have brought home with me from my adventures.
Its good to be home!
Thursday, December 29, 2011
How to change a life with $12
Have you ever seen a life changed by $12? I have.
There is a trend in our world these days where major international corporations are spending more and more of their advertising on “social” issues. This Christmas we saw as a major drink retailer told us that we should buy THEIR product because they are going to spend more money than you or I will see in our lifetimes to help the Polar Bears of the Arctic. The commercials show the mama bear’s struggle to survive among the melting ice cap.
It isn’t made clear exactly HOW sending our money to them will reverse the global warming responsible for those 2 little cubs struggle, But, we get a warm fuzzy feeling, and the big drink company gets to look like heroes. Last year, I would have thought, “oh that is nice”, and proceeded to buy that drink because it is what I usually buy, but feel just a little better knowing I was making a ‘difference’. I mean, who is Laura, and how can my $12.00 make a difference to anyone? So if by buying my usual product, I can contribute to the greater good… heck why not? Right?
That was the old me…this year, the new me has to resist the urge to scream at the movie screen “that is great for the polar bears, but what about all the children starving right this moment”. You see, in November I spent some time in Nepal, and we came face to face with people in dire straits- Poverty unlike anything we would ever encounter here in North America. We walked streets of a city where for the price of a beautiful meal in Canada, a pastor can feed his family for a month. In some senses, it is wonderful to know that just a little contribution from my pocket can make an exponentially larger impact than the same amount here. And yet, no matter how much you give, there will never be enough. You could drop suitcases full of Rupees from the sky, and somehow, this sin-sick world we live in would find a way to still destroy lives. Addiction, pain, poverty, corruption, caste systems and a bad economy always seem to win out.
During our travels, I was able to keep somewhat objective about what we were seeing. In an attempt to not become crippled by it, I held myself at arm’s length, keeping my heart safe from a burden that seemed too big. We discussed the theological response to poverty and pain, we debated different ways to assist, and whether the things that we did do were beneficial long-term or not. In all this though, I was untouched in the deepest places of my heart. Don’t misunderstand, I yearned to do more, to have more to give, mostly though, I wanted to see my brothers and sisters in Christ be able to navigate through what they were seeing. I wasn’t all that concerned about my lack of brokenness, I chalked it up to “its not my gifting”. I see that others have a deep and abiding passion to reach into the lives of the poor, the broken, and the orphaned and bring love, food and prayer to their garbage strewn alleyways.
I thought it wasn’t my gifting……And then Bikash stole my heart. One little boy, looking wistfully into the window of a café stole away all sense that this was someone else’s responsibility. Right there before me was “the least of these”. I wouldn’t have been able to identify that in the moment, I just knew I had to act. I got him something to eat out of that café, and began to talk to him. I learned that he is one of the “lucky” ones. He and his brother work at night picking up trash to sell. They have parents who love them, and a home, and they get to go to school during the day. More than some, there is hope for these little boys. Life is brutally hard, but there is hope. God did a work in me that night, on the streets of Kathmandu. I gave him some money so that he didn’t have to work that night ($5.00), prayed for him, and sent him on his way hopefully to spend a warm safe night at home.
Bikash received about $12.00 worth of food and cash that night, and I walked away a different person.
In the moment, I felt like I had done the right thing, I felt as though God had been glorified, and that was our goal. What I couldn’t know was that something fundamental had changed in me.
Please don’t misunderstand me. I believe that God ‘sees the little sparrow fall’ and cares about its wounds. I know that the plight of the Polar Bear and what we are doing to this creation that He has entrusted us with likely breaks his heart. I am glad that more and more companies are doing responsible things… and yet how much credit do we need to give the company who ‘sacrifices’ less than .02% of their ADVERTISING budget (not even revenues) to help creatures in the north?
I am convinced that given the choice of working on behalf of the Polar Bears, or fighting for the good of humanity, people should get my $12.00…every time!
There is a trend in our world these days where major international corporations are spending more and more of their advertising on “social” issues. This Christmas we saw as a major drink retailer told us that we should buy THEIR product because they are going to spend more money than you or I will see in our lifetimes to help the Polar Bears of the Arctic. The commercials show the mama bear’s struggle to survive among the melting ice cap.
It isn’t made clear exactly HOW sending our money to them will reverse the global warming responsible for those 2 little cubs struggle, But, we get a warm fuzzy feeling, and the big drink company gets to look like heroes. Last year, I would have thought, “oh that is nice”, and proceeded to buy that drink because it is what I usually buy, but feel just a little better knowing I was making a ‘difference’. I mean, who is Laura, and how can my $12.00 make a difference to anyone? So if by buying my usual product, I can contribute to the greater good… heck why not? Right?
That was the old me…this year, the new me has to resist the urge to scream at the movie screen “that is great for the polar bears, but what about all the children starving right this moment”. You see, in November I spent some time in Nepal, and we came face to face with people in dire straits- Poverty unlike anything we would ever encounter here in North America. We walked streets of a city where for the price of a beautiful meal in Canada, a pastor can feed his family for a month. In some senses, it is wonderful to know that just a little contribution from my pocket can make an exponentially larger impact than the same amount here. And yet, no matter how much you give, there will never be enough. You could drop suitcases full of Rupees from the sky, and somehow, this sin-sick world we live in would find a way to still destroy lives. Addiction, pain, poverty, corruption, caste systems and a bad economy always seem to win out.
During our travels, I was able to keep somewhat objective about what we were seeing. In an attempt to not become crippled by it, I held myself at arm’s length, keeping my heart safe from a burden that seemed too big. We discussed the theological response to poverty and pain, we debated different ways to assist, and whether the things that we did do were beneficial long-term or not. In all this though, I was untouched in the deepest places of my heart. Don’t misunderstand, I yearned to do more, to have more to give, mostly though, I wanted to see my brothers and sisters in Christ be able to navigate through what they were seeing. I wasn’t all that concerned about my lack of brokenness, I chalked it up to “its not my gifting”. I see that others have a deep and abiding passion to reach into the lives of the poor, the broken, and the orphaned and bring love, food and prayer to their garbage strewn alleyways.
I thought it wasn’t my gifting……And then Bikash stole my heart. One little boy, looking wistfully into the window of a café stole away all sense that this was someone else’s responsibility. Right there before me was “the least of these”. I wouldn’t have been able to identify that in the moment, I just knew I had to act. I got him something to eat out of that café, and began to talk to him. I learned that he is one of the “lucky” ones. He and his brother work at night picking up trash to sell. They have parents who love them, and a home, and they get to go to school during the day. More than some, there is hope for these little boys. Life is brutally hard, but there is hope. God did a work in me that night, on the streets of Kathmandu. I gave him some money so that he didn’t have to work that night ($5.00), prayed for him, and sent him on his way hopefully to spend a warm safe night at home.
Bikash received about $12.00 worth of food and cash that night, and I walked away a different person.
In the moment, I felt like I had done the right thing, I felt as though God had been glorified, and that was our goal. What I couldn’t know was that something fundamental had changed in me.
Please don’t misunderstand me. I believe that God ‘sees the little sparrow fall’ and cares about its wounds. I know that the plight of the Polar Bear and what we are doing to this creation that He has entrusted us with likely breaks his heart. I am glad that more and more companies are doing responsible things… and yet how much credit do we need to give the company who ‘sacrifices’ less than .02% of their ADVERTISING budget (not even revenues) to help creatures in the north?
I am convinced that given the choice of working on behalf of the Polar Bears, or fighting for the good of humanity, people should get my $12.00…every time!
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Weakness & Mercy
No one likes Monday... I don’t really either, and yet it is wonderful!
I LOVE anything that gives me a fresh opportunity. A new school year, a new house, a new daytimer with nothing written in it yet. It represents to me freshness and opportunities. I tend to be a sweeping changes type person. When I get…. I will…. Each time I looked ahead to my leave from overseas, I would imagine a wonderful time in which I would get up every morning early, do devotions and then run… come home to a healthy breakfast and a new outlook. Inevitably, my craving for greasy pizza would take over and I was done! Then again, toward the end of my vacation, the same thing… I will change my life by changing my circumstances etc.
Lamentations 3:21
This I recall to my mind therefore have I hope.
22It is of the LORD's mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not.
23They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness. -KJV
The good news is that a fresh week or day or year or month DOES hold unlimited opportunities. Yes, there are realities of past experiences, there are circumstances that we cannot just turn the calendar and have them disappear. And yet, we serve a God whose mercy is NEW EVERY MORNING. That means… each day God has put aside all that went before it. The mistakes and sins are as if it never happened in the eyes of God. Each day I have the opportunity to make a completely Fresh Start. It is us who tie ourselves to our past.
PSALM 103: 9-14
He will not always accuse,
nor will he harbour his anger forever;
10 he does not treat us as our sins deserve
or repay us according to our iniquities.
11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
so great is his love for those who fear him;
12 as far as the east is from the west,
so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
13 As a father has compassion on his children,
so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him;
14 for he knows how we are formed,
he remembers that we are dust.
HE REMEBERS that we are dust. How freeing is that? We have these expectations of ourselves to meet the expectations of those around us. Yes, the calling is HIGH. And yet, the one who called us is well aware of our weakness.
The Cross was the answer for our weakness. God knew that in our “dustiness” that we would never be able to live up to the standard.
Hebrews 4:15 For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. 16 Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.
So we turn to God, not in our strength, but in our weakness. It is then, that God says “OK… my dusty child… lets work on this. In MY strength. You don’t have to do it alone. “
Our world has a MASSIVE aversion to weakness. We have become a society obsessed with not showing weakness. We are all walking around hoping to hide our weaknesses from one another, and in doing so, when we see weaknesses in each other, our reactions are so strong because if I can see your weakness, perhaps you can see mine. So, like wounded animals, we attack each other in our weakest moments.; gossip, judgment and almost every reality TV show is about exposing one another’s weakness.
I think that God loves to expose our weaknesses. Not to leave us vulnerable to attack, but in order to show us where He is standing and fighting on our behalf.
Recently I travelled with some amazing friends. Two weeks in exotic, challenging situations. Inevitably, weaknesses were exposed. One of our friends- who is about as tough as they come- inadvertently revealed a ‘concern for the safety’ of suspension bridges. His words spoke of his “concern for the safety of….” but his face, demeanour and reluctance told us another story. He was fearful. It was a chink in his armour that was so incongruent with the rest of him, that it was almost comical. As his friends we had a choice to make. With some good-natured ribbing we ventured across leaving him on the other side to face his’ concern’. We didn’t make a big deal about it. We simply carried on our way, knowing that he would get across the bridge safely – he just needed some space. Throughout the trip we were faced with more than a few opportunities to see each other’s weaknesses. And I came to a discovery…
IT IS AN HONOUR TO COVER ONE ANOTHER’S WEAKNESS!
When you love someone as much as we love each other, and are seeking the best for one another, it is not a problem to cover each other. From motion sickness, to financial weakness, to language challenges in a foreign nation, we each had weaknesses that surfaced and in response the group brought its unique gifting to each situation, covered the weakness, and all were better for it. How much more… God?
Matthew 12:12How much more valuable is a person than a sheep!
Luke 11:13If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!”
Luke 12:24Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds!
Luke 12:28If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you—you of little faith!
Romans 5:9Since we have now been justified by his blood, how much more shall we be saved from God’s wrath through him!
Romans 5:10For if, while we were God’s enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life!
Romans 5:15But the gift is not like the trespass. For if the many died by the trespass of the one man, how much more did God’s grace and the gift that came by the grace of the one man, Jesus Christ, overflow to the many!
Romans 5:17For if, by the trespass of the one man, death reigned through that one man, how much more will those who receive God’s abundant provision of grace and of the gift of righteousness reign in life through the one man, Jesus Christ!
I want to entrust God with my weaknesses. I want to be someone who takes God at His word, that His mercies are new every morning. I want to move through my day each day knowing that God has removed my transgressions from me. I want to live in the shadow of the cross moment by moment, by moment.
So next time you turn the page in your daytimer and see the freshness, and remeber that He remembers we are DUST! And embrace Monday!
I LOVE anything that gives me a fresh opportunity. A new school year, a new house, a new daytimer with nothing written in it yet. It represents to me freshness and opportunities. I tend to be a sweeping changes type person. When I get…. I will…. Each time I looked ahead to my leave from overseas, I would imagine a wonderful time in which I would get up every morning early, do devotions and then run… come home to a healthy breakfast and a new outlook. Inevitably, my craving for greasy pizza would take over and I was done! Then again, toward the end of my vacation, the same thing… I will change my life by changing my circumstances etc.
Lamentations 3:21
This I recall to my mind therefore have I hope.
22It is of the LORD's mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not.
23They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness. -KJV
The good news is that a fresh week or day or year or month DOES hold unlimited opportunities. Yes, there are realities of past experiences, there are circumstances that we cannot just turn the calendar and have them disappear. And yet, we serve a God whose mercy is NEW EVERY MORNING. That means… each day God has put aside all that went before it. The mistakes and sins are as if it never happened in the eyes of God. Each day I have the opportunity to make a completely Fresh Start. It is us who tie ourselves to our past.
PSALM 103: 9-14
He will not always accuse,
nor will he harbour his anger forever;
10 he does not treat us as our sins deserve
or repay us according to our iniquities.
11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
so great is his love for those who fear him;
12 as far as the east is from the west,
so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
13 As a father has compassion on his children,
so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him;
14 for he knows how we are formed,
he remembers that we are dust.
HE REMEBERS that we are dust. How freeing is that? We have these expectations of ourselves to meet the expectations of those around us. Yes, the calling is HIGH. And yet, the one who called us is well aware of our weakness.
The Cross was the answer for our weakness. God knew that in our “dustiness” that we would never be able to live up to the standard.
Hebrews 4:15 For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. 16 Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.
So we turn to God, not in our strength, but in our weakness. It is then, that God says “OK… my dusty child… lets work on this. In MY strength. You don’t have to do it alone. “
Our world has a MASSIVE aversion to weakness. We have become a society obsessed with not showing weakness. We are all walking around hoping to hide our weaknesses from one another, and in doing so, when we see weaknesses in each other, our reactions are so strong because if I can see your weakness, perhaps you can see mine. So, like wounded animals, we attack each other in our weakest moments.; gossip, judgment and almost every reality TV show is about exposing one another’s weakness.
I think that God loves to expose our weaknesses. Not to leave us vulnerable to attack, but in order to show us where He is standing and fighting on our behalf.
Recently I travelled with some amazing friends. Two weeks in exotic, challenging situations. Inevitably, weaknesses were exposed. One of our friends- who is about as tough as they come- inadvertently revealed a ‘concern for the safety’ of suspension bridges. His words spoke of his “concern for the safety of….” but his face, demeanour and reluctance told us another story. He was fearful. It was a chink in his armour that was so incongruent with the rest of him, that it was almost comical. As his friends we had a choice to make. With some good-natured ribbing we ventured across leaving him on the other side to face his’ concern’. We didn’t make a big deal about it. We simply carried on our way, knowing that he would get across the bridge safely – he just needed some space. Throughout the trip we were faced with more than a few opportunities to see each other’s weaknesses. And I came to a discovery…
IT IS AN HONOUR TO COVER ONE ANOTHER’S WEAKNESS!
When you love someone as much as we love each other, and are seeking the best for one another, it is not a problem to cover each other. From motion sickness, to financial weakness, to language challenges in a foreign nation, we each had weaknesses that surfaced and in response the group brought its unique gifting to each situation, covered the weakness, and all were better for it. How much more… God?
Matthew 12:12How much more valuable is a person than a sheep!
Luke 11:13If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!”
Luke 12:24Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds!
Luke 12:28If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you—you of little faith!
Romans 5:9Since we have now been justified by his blood, how much more shall we be saved from God’s wrath through him!
Romans 5:10For if, while we were God’s enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life!
Romans 5:15But the gift is not like the trespass. For if the many died by the trespass of the one man, how much more did God’s grace and the gift that came by the grace of the one man, Jesus Christ, overflow to the many!
Romans 5:17For if, by the trespass of the one man, death reigned through that one man, how much more will those who receive God’s abundant provision of grace and of the gift of righteousness reign in life through the one man, Jesus Christ!
I want to entrust God with my weaknesses. I want to be someone who takes God at His word, that His mercies are new every morning. I want to move through my day each day knowing that God has removed my transgressions from me. I want to live in the shadow of the cross moment by moment, by moment.
So next time you turn the page in your daytimer and see the freshness, and remeber that He remembers we are DUST! And embrace Monday!
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Will I answer the call??
Each time I watch a movie like Schindler's List, or Hotel Rwanda, I come face to face with a bit of myself. I ALWAYS wonder... would I be one who would risk my family and my life to help others? Would I be willing to flaunt the law to protect those who are being persecuted? Or would I close my eyes and rationalize away my own protectionism? Would I have the eyes to see the bigger evils at stake? The Germans in WWII didn't flip a switch and start murdering Jews, there was an insidious campaign that took time to reveal it's true intent.
Would I see it? Would I stand with those who DO see it and help them, or would I lock my doors and huddle in my living room watching it all on CNN?
My brave self says Yes! I would be like them! I would fling open the doors, face the rebels and protect the victims with the strength of my beliefs. And yet... too often when someone is dying in front of me, I turn away. I don't give them the help they desperately need. When some one's life is clearly under attack by an enemy I can easily identify, but choose to say nothing, they cannot protect themselves.
I am not talking about the physical world, I doubt very many of us would actually turn away. I am talking about the spiritual world. The people all around us are dying, they are under attack. They are busy living their lives not realizing what is coming their way, or worse, they are resigned to their fate.
Isn't that what we as Christians believe? That everyone who has not received Christ is destined for a holocaust?
And yet, SO many times, as Christians we have been taught (rightly in some ways) to keep our lives unsullied by the things of the world.... yet in doing that, are we closing our doors to the refugees? To those who need shelter? "the least of these?".
If this world truly is NOT our home as the Bible teaches, (The IF comes not from the truth of the Bible, but the IF is about our beliefs) then don't we have a privilege of obligation to open up our doors, and risk that which isn't even ours for the good of those around us?
How would our lives and conduct change if we could actually see the enemy as in 1 Peter 5:8?
Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. 9 Resist him,firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world.
My prayer is that when I encounter people who don't know God, whose lives are under attack, that I would have the courage, and the willingness to open the door to my heart, and stand alongside them in the battle and shelter them from those who would see to destroy them.
This dirty, gritty walk flows counter to the pretty self-esteem building message that so many of us are fed in our North American churches. Let's not forget, Jesus' message was dangerous, it was heavy and it called people to risk their lives for its sake. When was the last time you (I say to myself) risked anything but your 'pride' to reach out to those who are dying?
Would I see it? Would I stand with those who DO see it and help them, or would I lock my doors and huddle in my living room watching it all on CNN?
My brave self says Yes! I would be like them! I would fling open the doors, face the rebels and protect the victims with the strength of my beliefs. And yet... too often when someone is dying in front of me, I turn away. I don't give them the help they desperately need. When some one's life is clearly under attack by an enemy I can easily identify, but choose to say nothing, they cannot protect themselves.
I am not talking about the physical world, I doubt very many of us would actually turn away. I am talking about the spiritual world. The people all around us are dying, they are under attack. They are busy living their lives not realizing what is coming their way, or worse, they are resigned to their fate.
Isn't that what we as Christians believe? That everyone who has not received Christ is destined for a holocaust?
And yet, SO many times, as Christians we have been taught (rightly in some ways) to keep our lives unsullied by the things of the world.... yet in doing that, are we closing our doors to the refugees? To those who need shelter? "the least of these?".
If this world truly is NOT our home as the Bible teaches, (The IF comes not from the truth of the Bible, but the IF is about our beliefs) then don't we have a privilege of obligation to open up our doors, and risk that which isn't even ours for the good of those around us?
How would our lives and conduct change if we could actually see the enemy as in 1 Peter 5:8?
Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. 9 Resist him,firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world.
My prayer is that when I encounter people who don't know God, whose lives are under attack, that I would have the courage, and the willingness to open the door to my heart, and stand alongside them in the battle and shelter them from those who would see to destroy them.
This dirty, gritty walk flows counter to the pretty self-esteem building message that so many of us are fed in our North American churches. Let's not forget, Jesus' message was dangerous, it was heavy and it called people to risk their lives for its sake. When was the last time you (I say to myself) risked anything but your 'pride' to reach out to those who are dying?
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Smells like Smoke
I wish... I REALLY wish sometimes that when God decides to turn up the heat to burn off more of the copious dross in my life, that there would be a quick heads up... maybe a brief whiff of smoke that would grab my attention. I have many memories as a kid of my parents when they thought they smelled smoke. ANY whiff of smoke and they were on HIGH ALERT. Every nook and cranny would be searched and every door opened looking for the danger, looking for any sign of the possible fire. With one notable instance, their scrutiny never netted any drama.
If I choose to take God at His word, then I know that HE is constantly moving me in the direction of deeper obedience and passion for Him.
I have a deep seated belief that given a moment like Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, that I would be happy to walk into the fiery furnace. When the challenge is obviously ahead of me. You can see the flame, feel the heat, and take a moment to trust in God... easy, right?
God doesn't usually do this in my life (or I am not attuned to the smokey precursor of the furnace). I find myself in the midst of a circumstance of mild discomfort.... I handle it. It seems that only when the walls of my life are crashing around me, do I think to look around and see if I am already in the midst of the furnace.
(I am well aware that I mixed the metaphor here with the purifying heat of God's love, and the fiery furnace... its my blog... get your own! )
My beliefs support the idea of "HE who started a good work will be faithful to complete it Contrast this with the idea that EVERYTHING is God testing us and trying us. Although I am still working out the theology, I realize by removing the idea that EVERYTHING is God testing us, can result in being less situationally aware. It leaves my sense of smell dulled- I am not actively looking for a test or pitfall and sometimes I miss the signs.
Sure there is peace in knowing that the smoke detectors will go off and so I can sleep at night without worry, but it isn't good when your first realization of a problem is that the kitchen is full of smoke and the mice who live under the sink have already abandoned ship!
My heart's desire is to know when God is at work. I want to be better at seeing the purifying circumstances sooner in the timeline of challenge. I want to be so in tune with God that I don't have to wait to feel the heat- but that I hear the whisper from the Father to the Son "OK, turn up the heat JUST a bit, there is much I want to do in Laura".
If I choose to take God at His word, then I know that HE is constantly moving me in the direction of deeper obedience and passion for Him.
I have a deep seated belief that given a moment like Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, that I would be happy to walk into the fiery furnace. When the challenge is obviously ahead of me. You can see the flame, feel the heat, and take a moment to trust in God... easy, right?
God doesn't usually do this in my life (or I am not attuned to the smokey precursor of the furnace). I find myself in the midst of a circumstance of mild discomfort.... I handle it. It seems that only when the walls of my life are crashing around me, do I think to look around and see if I am already in the midst of the furnace.
(I am well aware that I mixed the metaphor here with the purifying heat of God's love, and the fiery furnace... its my blog... get your own! )
My beliefs support the idea of "HE who started a good work will be faithful to complete it Contrast this with the idea that EVERYTHING is God testing us and trying us. Although I am still working out the theology, I realize by removing the idea that EVERYTHING is God testing us, can result in being less situationally aware. It leaves my sense of smell dulled- I am not actively looking for a test or pitfall and sometimes I miss the signs.
Sure there is peace in knowing that the smoke detectors will go off and so I can sleep at night without worry, but it isn't good when your first realization of a problem is that the kitchen is full of smoke and the mice who live under the sink have already abandoned ship!
My heart's desire is to know when God is at work. I want to be better at seeing the purifying circumstances sooner in the timeline of challenge. I want to be so in tune with God that I don't have to wait to feel the heat- but that I hear the whisper from the Father to the Son "OK, turn up the heat JUST a bit, there is much I want to do in Laura".
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Announcement
I have an announcement to make......
I'm alllll done.....
If you are addicted to your crackberry/iPhone/whaatever other gadget you use for EVERYTHING in your life...... I am NO longer going to feel badly for sending you an email that MIGHT wake you up because you haven't disconnected your work email from your personal phone.
I am NO LONGER going to sympathize with the natural consequences if you don't set good boundaries and can't say no so are over tired....
Please don't cry on my shoulder if you cannot balance your work and life so that you can leave your desk for lunch and then are hungry in the middle of the afternoon... I won't leave MY work to go and get you an energy drink that is not going to help you.
For all you work-a-holics who complain about having no social life... FRANKLY.. YOU AREN'T SOOOO important that it cannot wait until tomorrow....
I am not sure what is happening to our society when we wear lack of sleep, or skipped meals as a badge of honour or commitment to the cause...
So, I am going to interact with technology the way it was meant to be interacted with- ON MY TERMS. I will not apologize for turning off my cell phone for one hour on my DAY OFF to go to church. I will NOT feel badly that I was at lunch when your lack of planning resulted in fake drama.
If that doesn't fit your idea of what should be.... im sorr.... no wait... acutally I'm not!
If you have any concerns about the above....... send me an email... I'll get back to you tomorrow.
I'm alllll done.....
If you are addicted to your crackberry/iPhone/whaatever other gadget you use for EVERYTHING in your life...... I am NO longer going to feel badly for sending you an email that MIGHT wake you up because you haven't disconnected your work email from your personal phone.
I am NO LONGER going to sympathize with the natural consequences if you don't set good boundaries and can't say no so are over tired....
Please don't cry on my shoulder if you cannot balance your work and life so that you can leave your desk for lunch and then are hungry in the middle of the afternoon... I won't leave MY work to go and get you an energy drink that is not going to help you.
For all you work-a-holics who complain about having no social life... FRANKLY.. YOU AREN'T SOOOO important that it cannot wait until tomorrow....
I am not sure what is happening to our society when we wear lack of sleep, or skipped meals as a badge of honour or commitment to the cause...
So, I am going to interact with technology the way it was meant to be interacted with- ON MY TERMS. I will not apologize for turning off my cell phone for one hour on my DAY OFF to go to church. I will NOT feel badly that I was at lunch when your lack of planning resulted in fake drama.
If that doesn't fit your idea of what should be.... im sorr.... no wait... acutally I'm not!
If you have any concerns about the above....... send me an email... I'll get back to you tomorrow.
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Counting .....
There is so much about our world that is focussed on counting... we count the minutes, the successes and the money. We count anniversaries and we countdown to big events.
Today as we mark the 10th anniversary I sat surrounded by Military personnel and we were encouraged to count. We were encouraged to thnk of the people connected to us directly who were impacted by the events on 9/11. It took me a moment to think... no one I know was killed or injured or involved nor their families that I know of.. so I thought that I didn't have anyone... and I realized that everyone I was in church with this am was profoundly impacted by the events of that day.
And so I began to count....
16 Students who were in my class that day and will be forever part of MY 9/11 story, I am proud of the adults that they are becoming in this strange world that we live in.
2 friends dead- combat injuries
1 friend paralyzed from the neck down - combat injuries
21 Coffins that I have stood while they begin their journey home. Although I never met any of them, I have become a part of thier history... granted a tiny afterthought, but I am one more person who will carry the memory of thier lives with me for the rest of mine.
But then the faces of others who I have had the privilege to know over the time who have seen things that no one should ever see, and those who have watched thier friends go home in a coffin. I have known those who have to literally pick up the pieces after an event.
And so what is the cost?
the events of 9/11 have created a new world for all of us. Ironically those we remember today are the only ones who will never remember this post-9/11 world we live in.
My Bible says that EVERYTHING the enemy intends for evil, God has the opportunity to redeem. While I am remembering the losses, I am also remembering the positives... the people from all over the world, the new friends, and the deeper faith that our world has delivered to my doorstep as a direct result of what happened on 9/11.
Today, people all over the world will be counting, mothers from all nations will be counting empty places at tables, brothers are injured, sisters are changed for life.
What price have you paid?
Today as we mark the 10th anniversary I sat surrounded by Military personnel and we were encouraged to count. We were encouraged to thnk of the people connected to us directly who were impacted by the events on 9/11. It took me a moment to think... no one I know was killed or injured or involved nor their families that I know of.. so I thought that I didn't have anyone... and I realized that everyone I was in church with this am was profoundly impacted by the events of that day.
And so I began to count....
16 Students who were in my class that day and will be forever part of MY 9/11 story, I am proud of the adults that they are becoming in this strange world that we live in.
2 friends dead- combat injuries
1 friend paralyzed from the neck down - combat injuries
21 Coffins that I have stood while they begin their journey home. Although I never met any of them, I have become a part of thier history... granted a tiny afterthought, but I am one more person who will carry the memory of thier lives with me for the rest of mine.
But then the faces of others who I have had the privilege to know over the time who have seen things that no one should ever see, and those who have watched thier friends go home in a coffin. I have known those who have to literally pick up the pieces after an event.
And so what is the cost?
the events of 9/11 have created a new world for all of us. Ironically those we remember today are the only ones who will never remember this post-9/11 world we live in.
My Bible says that EVERYTHING the enemy intends for evil, God has the opportunity to redeem. While I am remembering the losses, I am also remembering the positives... the people from all over the world, the new friends, and the deeper faith that our world has delivered to my doorstep as a direct result of what happened on 9/11.
Today, people all over the world will be counting, mothers from all nations will be counting empty places at tables, brothers are injured, sisters are changed for life.
What price have you paid?
Thursday, September 08, 2011
The Other Side of the Story
Living in an environment where I am surrounded by people from different nations and job descriptions so many of my pre-conceived notions have been challenged. I have been reminded over and over that my persepctive is not the only one. And in that realization I have also been shown in new ways the negative effects that our actions can have on others without even realizing it.
We have a tendancy in our western philosophy to see things the way we see them and not scratch beneath the surface, but spend time discussing world history with someone from Russia, or Belgium or the UK, and you realize that what we think of as 'ancient' history (1-200 years) is recent memory to others. I have a friend who lives in a home that was built before Canadian Confederation and it itsn't even an historically protected home because it is too "NEW".
So in the midst of shattered paradigms I have begun to listen more intently to the other side of stories.
I know why I choose not to be in relationships with non-Christians, and I understand the motivations that lead me on that path, and yet, to hear from a man who has fallen deeply in love with a Christian woman for as much as she would let him, only to be devastated by the realization that his not being a Christian disqualified him from her love.... and then to hear him express the concern that perhaps this was a reflection of how God would treat him....
And my heart shattered along with my safe thinking about this topic.
Recently, I was out with a male friend. Although tall, and handsome, his body type is not the Big Beefy 'normal' that exists in my workplace. That type which says don't mess with me on my way to the gym.......I call them the Beefys. We came across a group of the Beefys and stopped to chat. As we walked away, my friend expressed how sometimes being around those Beefys gives him a complex, and how it makes him feel like abandoning all assurances of his worth in Christ.
And My heart shattered.
Here is the reality.... Ladies... who doesn't like the idea of a big beefy man next to you, looking like he could take on the world on your behalf? These Beefys that we encountered also tend to be "A-Type" personalities.... so likely as not to have a funny story or a veiled reference to something that they aren't supposed to talk about.... and I am putty in their hands.....
Yes, I admit it, when they come around I tend to twitter and giggle just like the other girls, because frankly I have a bit of a complex that guys this "cool" would never normally be my friend!
And Yet... as we walked away and I heard my dear friend express his insecurityin the face of the Beefys.. I realized something...
I would trade the chance to be friends with all the Beefys in the universe and feel like I look cool.... for this friend of mine who has proven to be kind, gentle, generous in sprit and wealth. He is constant and polite, caring and LOVES Jesus.
There were no words to say in that moment. Everything that I could think of simply felt like empty words in the face of my interaction with the Beefys. Actions speak louder than words...
I realized tonight that with everything there is another side of the story. I want to be more aware of the people around me and the way that my actions reflect the love of God to them.
We have a tendancy in our western philosophy to see things the way we see them and not scratch beneath the surface, but spend time discussing world history with someone from Russia, or Belgium or the UK, and you realize that what we think of as 'ancient' history (1-200 years) is recent memory to others. I have a friend who lives in a home that was built before Canadian Confederation and it itsn't even an historically protected home because it is too "NEW".
So in the midst of shattered paradigms I have begun to listen more intently to the other side of stories.
I know why I choose not to be in relationships with non-Christians, and I understand the motivations that lead me on that path, and yet, to hear from a man who has fallen deeply in love with a Christian woman for as much as she would let him, only to be devastated by the realization that his not being a Christian disqualified him from her love.... and then to hear him express the concern that perhaps this was a reflection of how God would treat him....
And my heart shattered along with my safe thinking about this topic.
Recently, I was out with a male friend. Although tall, and handsome, his body type is not the Big Beefy 'normal' that exists in my workplace. That type which says don't mess with me on my way to the gym.......I call them the Beefys. We came across a group of the Beefys and stopped to chat. As we walked away, my friend expressed how sometimes being around those Beefys gives him a complex, and how it makes him feel like abandoning all assurances of his worth in Christ.
And My heart shattered.
Here is the reality.... Ladies... who doesn't like the idea of a big beefy man next to you, looking like he could take on the world on your behalf? These Beefys that we encountered also tend to be "A-Type" personalities.... so likely as not to have a funny story or a veiled reference to something that they aren't supposed to talk about.... and I am putty in their hands.....
Yes, I admit it, when they come around I tend to twitter and giggle just like the other girls, because frankly I have a bit of a complex that guys this "cool" would never normally be my friend!
And Yet... as we walked away and I heard my dear friend express his insecurityin the face of the Beefys.. I realized something...
I would trade the chance to be friends with all the Beefys in the universe and feel like I look cool.... for this friend of mine who has proven to be kind, gentle, generous in sprit and wealth. He is constant and polite, caring and LOVES Jesus.
There were no words to say in that moment. Everything that I could think of simply felt like empty words in the face of my interaction with the Beefys. Actions speak louder than words...
I realized tonight that with everything there is another side of the story. I want to be more aware of the people around me and the way that my actions reflect the love of God to them.
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Conspiracy Theories
I am a conspiracy theorist. But not just your run of the mill tinfoil-wearing someone's watching me paranoid crazy! I am beyond a theorist... because a thoeory has yet to be proven.
Most people like me have a particular 'pet' subject they purport- either we didn't actually land on the moon, or the matrix IS real..... I don't care a lot about those other "theories". My conspiracy of choice is the belief that God is Conspiring to bring about HIS glory in the world, and HIS destiny in our lives!
Call me crazy, but I have PROOF! First of all the Bible says so... and just like the sunday school song implies... when the Bible says so, it must be true! But beyond that... I have first hand accounts of moments in time when God seems to reach through the cosmos, and puts something in my path time and again until I realize that it is a subject I need to pay attention to.
Recently it has been what it means to have good character. Everywhere I turn there are moments that challenge my desire to live a life of character. And then many times throughout the day there are reminders that the standard is high. Everything from shows on TV, or themes of movies, to just now a favourite quote buried in a long string of emails that I JUST HAPPEN to recieve on something completely unrelated.
And so it seems like every conspiracy theorist out there... I choose to attach deeper meanings to mundane things. Except when it comes to God we KNOW that He never does anything without deeper meaning. Every step of His life was miraculous just on the surface, and then when you plumb the deepest depths of understanding you realize that every thing right down to His name, His place of birth and the response of people to His death holds layers and layers of moving and remarkable meaning. Since God is the same, yesterday, today and forever, I choose to believe that every moment of the day can be steeped in the miraculous move of God.
Is it a coincidence that, when staying in a new city for a month, just when I was getting desperate for company, I decided to opo unexpectedly into a store and as I did, a friend from home "happened" to be there? I doubt it.
What keeps popping up in your life like a strange obsession? What do you feel bombarded by? take a good look at the themes that recur... it could be a key to what God is doing in you and through you.
Most people like me have a particular 'pet' subject they purport- either we didn't actually land on the moon, or the matrix IS real..... I don't care a lot about those other "theories". My conspiracy of choice is the belief that God is Conspiring to bring about HIS glory in the world, and HIS destiny in our lives!
Call me crazy, but I have PROOF! First of all the Bible says so... and just like the sunday school song implies... when the Bible says so, it must be true! But beyond that... I have first hand accounts of moments in time when God seems to reach through the cosmos, and puts something in my path time and again until I realize that it is a subject I need to pay attention to.
Recently it has been what it means to have good character. Everywhere I turn there are moments that challenge my desire to live a life of character. And then many times throughout the day there are reminders that the standard is high. Everything from shows on TV, or themes of movies, to just now a favourite quote buried in a long string of emails that I JUST HAPPEN to recieve on something completely unrelated.
And so it seems like every conspiracy theorist out there... I choose to attach deeper meanings to mundane things. Except when it comes to God we KNOW that He never does anything without deeper meaning. Every step of His life was miraculous just on the surface, and then when you plumb the deepest depths of understanding you realize that every thing right down to His name, His place of birth and the response of people to His death holds layers and layers of moving and remarkable meaning. Since God is the same, yesterday, today and forever, I choose to believe that every moment of the day can be steeped in the miraculous move of God.
Is it a coincidence that, when staying in a new city for a month, just when I was getting desperate for company, I decided to opo unexpectedly into a store and as I did, a friend from home "happened" to be there? I doubt it.
What keeps popping up in your life like a strange obsession? What do you feel bombarded by? take a good look at the themes that recur... it could be a key to what God is doing in you and through you.
Monday, August 22, 2011
Rejected? Not- Chosen? with a side of Stop Helping Me!
Have you ever seen 2 year old stumble and fall? There is always that split second of shock followed EVERYTIME by a glance at the parental unit closest to gauge their response. As an adult in their lives, they look to us to decide whether to be upset or not. IF we respond with treipdation or angst..... the floodgates open, BUT... if you look with surprise that matches theirs and make light, they will get up and go about their way. Keep that picture in your mind and walk with me on a journey.
Tonight I went to a prayer meeting I had never attended before. We began to lift up the leaders of our nations, the soldiers who fight for those nations and who are in battle. We lifted up our families and those who we are praying for. Then we moved onto the next topic. The lady leading the prayer meeting began a heartfelt prayer intercession for "THE SINGLES" She began.... "Lord, we pray for the singles, we pray that you would heal their hurts and rejections." She continued in a very sincere and heartfelt manner. (As an aside: Know that if you are single and not sure if anyone cares... there are genuinely people who care and who want you to fulfill your destiny in God, and who earnestly lift up to God your desire to be married).
After a time, she moved on to the next group of afflicted personnel requiring our prayers... the prisoners!
I began to wonder..... why does the church continue to approach singleness as a dread affliction that we need to be redeemed from all the while telling us to enjoy the season that we are in?
I am not of the mind that people can make you feel a certain way, however, is it possible that the words the church uses and the approach that often is taken contributes to this idea in our heads that we are more hurt, more rejected, and more pathetic than we already feel just because we are single?
Like that child who, in a moment of uncertainty after a stumble, isn't sure whether this is a bump, or something more.... we look around and reflect the reactions that we see around us. If people didn't speak of my singleness with pity, would I feel quite so pitiful? If those I love, didn't try to "encourage" me so much would I feel so discouraged? And if those around didn't try to HELP so much..... might I just feel a little more like there was nothing really wrong with me??
Maybe???
Just because no one has CHOSEN me to be thier spouse, does that mean I have been REJECTED? Are those the corrollery of one another?? I think not. They are not equal opposites. I am waiting to be chosen. Some have chosen others instead of me... but all have NOT rejected me.
Thank you kind lady for your heartfelt prayers tonight. I understand your heart cry. I appreciate the care. And yet...... you can stop building the ladder to help me out of the pit that I haven't fallen into just yet.
Please.... stop HELPING ME!!!
Tonight I went to a prayer meeting I had never attended before. We began to lift up the leaders of our nations, the soldiers who fight for those nations and who are in battle. We lifted up our families and those who we are praying for. Then we moved onto the next topic. The lady leading the prayer meeting began a heartfelt prayer intercession for "THE SINGLES" She began.... "Lord, we pray for the singles, we pray that you would heal their hurts and rejections." She continued in a very sincere and heartfelt manner. (As an aside: Know that if you are single and not sure if anyone cares... there are genuinely people who care and who want you to fulfill your destiny in God, and who earnestly lift up to God your desire to be married).
After a time, she moved on to the next group of afflicted personnel requiring our prayers... the prisoners!
I began to wonder..... why does the church continue to approach singleness as a dread affliction that we need to be redeemed from all the while telling us to enjoy the season that we are in?
I am not of the mind that people can make you feel a certain way, however, is it possible that the words the church uses and the approach that often is taken contributes to this idea in our heads that we are more hurt, more rejected, and more pathetic than we already feel just because we are single?
Like that child who, in a moment of uncertainty after a stumble, isn't sure whether this is a bump, or something more.... we look around and reflect the reactions that we see around us. If people didn't speak of my singleness with pity, would I feel quite so pitiful? If those I love, didn't try to "encourage" me so much would I feel so discouraged? And if those around didn't try to HELP so much..... might I just feel a little more like there was nothing really wrong with me??
Maybe???
Just because no one has CHOSEN me to be thier spouse, does that mean I have been REJECTED? Are those the corrollery of one another?? I think not. They are not equal opposites. I am waiting to be chosen. Some have chosen others instead of me... but all have NOT rejected me.
Thank you kind lady for your heartfelt prayers tonight. I understand your heart cry. I appreciate the care. And yet...... you can stop building the ladder to help me out of the pit that I haven't fallen into just yet.
Please.... stop HELPING ME!!!
Sunday, August 21, 2011
Is that even the right question
2 Years and 1000 stories since my last post. Lately, though I have been feeling as though I need to get back to this. Sharing some of what God is doing in my life, and the things I am learning daily.
It is important to have a record of the progress.
Recently, I have been bombarded from every side by the questions of what it means to be a woman in the church. What it means to be a wife (some day!) and how my female gender impacts my calling in God.
One of the biggest things that single women face daily is the question of dating/hanging out with/ making out with/ seeing/ (insert title or justification here) non-Christian men. We all know that the ideal is for us to marry a wonderful Christian man who will lead our homes with wisdom, grace, and the occasional delivery of flowers or chocolate! But somehow in the walking out of that, I see all around me wise women of faith settling for something less than God's best. For the sake of full disclosure, I am referring to others' actions around me, not because I am blameless, rather the opportunity hasn't presented itself. For the most part, the Godly women around me are not completely falling off the bandwagon, we are all still hoping for a Christian man to sweep us off our feet.... and YET.... WHERE ARE THEY!
This desire was so succinctly expressed by a good friend late one night when she lamented: :WHAT DOES GOD EXPECT??? IF CHRISTIAN MEN ASKED ME OUT I WOULD GO OUT WITH THEM!!!! But in the meantime.....
For a while I took up that battle cry (let's be honest, I am open to any loopholes!) and decided it was all God's fault. Again.... without the "opportunity" to put my new-found conviction to the test.... it sat for a while. But it didn't quite sit right.... it seemed to still fall short of the best that God says HE has for me. And truth be told... I KNOW what God "expects of me!"
A podcast of a sermon by Andy Stanley entitled "Character Under Construction" touched briefly on this topic. And to sum it up..... as I listened, the lament of my good friend of "God, what do you expect of me" was answered by the words "ABIDE IN ME".
I got to thinking about that. When did we decide that it was our "right" to get physical affection from the opposite sex? When did we decide that there was a lifetime quota that we are "owed" and if God doesn't bring along someone who fits His standard... then we are free to "get some"(not ALL) from whoever stands in front of us (and is asking... and is interesting!).
The world would tell us that we are not in control of our thoughts, or actions. That when it comes to the full spectrum of sex... it is a physiological necessity for us to "git me some!"
I have found in 3 years of travelling for work and being away from my family for long periods of time, that I struggle MOST with physical purity when there are not people in my vicinity who "KNOW" me. Those people who fill up my love tank with their very presence. Those intimate friendships where you have seen one another at your lowest point. Those people who you are happy to have in your house in the midst of the Saturday morning chaos!
So... today I stand in the promises of God and remind myself of what GOD expects of me... that in ALL things... I would ABIDE in Him.
Now if you will excuse me.... gotta freshen up my makeup.... off to lunch!
It is important to have a record of the progress.
Recently, I have been bombarded from every side by the questions of what it means to be a woman in the church. What it means to be a wife (some day!) and how my female gender impacts my calling in God.
One of the biggest things that single women face daily is the question of dating/hanging out with/ making out with/ seeing/ (insert title or justification here) non-Christian men. We all know that the ideal is for us to marry a wonderful Christian man who will lead our homes with wisdom, grace, and the occasional delivery of flowers or chocolate! But somehow in the walking out of that, I see all around me wise women of faith settling for something less than God's best. For the sake of full disclosure, I am referring to others' actions around me, not because I am blameless, rather the opportunity hasn't presented itself. For the most part, the Godly women around me are not completely falling off the bandwagon, we are all still hoping for a Christian man to sweep us off our feet.... and YET.... WHERE ARE THEY!
This desire was so succinctly expressed by a good friend late one night when she lamented: :WHAT DOES GOD EXPECT??? IF CHRISTIAN MEN ASKED ME OUT I WOULD GO OUT WITH THEM!!!! But in the meantime.....
For a while I took up that battle cry (let's be honest, I am open to any loopholes!) and decided it was all God's fault. Again.... without the "opportunity" to put my new-found conviction to the test.... it sat for a while. But it didn't quite sit right.... it seemed to still fall short of the best that God says HE has for me. And truth be told... I KNOW what God "expects of me!"
A podcast of a sermon by Andy Stanley entitled "Character Under Construction" touched briefly on this topic. And to sum it up..... as I listened, the lament of my good friend of "God, what do you expect of me" was answered by the words "ABIDE IN ME".
I got to thinking about that. When did we decide that it was our "right" to get physical affection from the opposite sex? When did we decide that there was a lifetime quota that we are "owed" and if God doesn't bring along someone who fits His standard... then we are free to "get some"(not ALL) from whoever stands in front of us (and is asking... and is interesting!).
The world would tell us that we are not in control of our thoughts, or actions. That when it comes to the full spectrum of sex... it is a physiological necessity for us to "git me some!"
I have found in 3 years of travelling for work and being away from my family for long periods of time, that I struggle MOST with physical purity when there are not people in my vicinity who "KNOW" me. Those people who fill up my love tank with their very presence. Those intimate friendships where you have seen one another at your lowest point. Those people who you are happy to have in your house in the midst of the Saturday morning chaos!
So... today I stand in the promises of God and remind myself of what GOD expects of me... that in ALL things... I would ABIDE in Him.
Now if you will excuse me.... gotta freshen up my makeup.... off to lunch!
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Insha'allah
Insha'allah, is a phrase used by people who speak Arabic to express "hopefully" or "if God wills". It is similar to some Christian usage of "if Jesus tarries". It essentially acknowledges that God is God and only He knows the future, so we hope in Him. It takes some of the pressure off those who are involved in the circumstances and releases us to trust God more. A funny example of this is when I was away and a merchant at the market was pressuring me to buy carpets that I wanted to think about, he tried to tell me that they wouldn't last long and that if I liked them I should jump at the chance. My response was "Insha'allah".... if it is meant to be it will be. I found this response effective, especially when accompanied by a very Eastern shrug of one shoulder. It not only expressed to him that I was above being pressured, but it sealed in my heart that truly if it was meant to be it would be and I was free to make a wise purchase.
Obviously, the God that I serve and the god of the Muslim faith are 2 different realities, however, the heart attitude is still the same.
On the eve of the elections in Afghanistan, this mindset is so important. I cannot imagine what it would be like to weigh the opportunity to cast a vote, with the possibility that casting that vote could get you hurt or killed! How do you even begin to make that decision? I have been following the lead up to this election very closely! I am excited to see that the NATO forces are taking the Taliban threats so seriously. It is my prayer that the people of Afghanistan will feel the nations of the world standing up in protection as they enter polling stations. That their view of the ability of the Afghan police and Army to protect them will change. As they see others risking their lives to vote, I pray that they will feel how much we have invested in them. It is amazing that this is all happening on one day. The same day that NATO will halt its operations and focus on the safety of those who choose to invest in the political process.
Tyranny and oppression wants people isolated, uneducated and scared. But this day, this election-insha'allah- will provide an opportunity to for EACH afghan citizen to take back this moment of their lives. I pray with everything in me, that this day will be the beginning of a groundswell of national pride, and a renewed resolve to see thier nation healed and rebuilt.
There are so many complexities to this situation, and by no means do I seek to naively wade into the noise and offer trite solutions. I am, however, passionate about seeing the people of Afghanistan rise above all those who would oppress them. To find home-grown solutions to these major issues, to get fed up of being the punching bag of those who would exploit them. I have a vision of once again walking streets but this time, instead of a flack vest, I am carrying my child or my grand-child, showing where I have been. I want to freely explore the heritage and beauty of this nation that has so completely captured my heart! Like with anything that we love, I want the BEST!
So tonight our time, as people venture out into the uncertainty, my prayer is for safety, and for eyes that are open to all those who are sacrificing so much to assist, and it will renew in them a sense of nationhood and purpose.
PSALM 46 says:
1 God is our refuge and strength,
an ever-present help in trouble.
2 Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way
and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea,
3 though its waters roar and foam
and the mountains quake with their surging. Selah
4 There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God,
the holy place where the Most High dwells.
5 God is within her, she will not fall;
God will help her at break of day.
6 Nations are in uproar, kingdoms fall;
he lifts his voice, the earth melts.
7 The LORD Almighty is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress. Selah
8 Come and see the works of the LORD,
the desolations he has brought on the earth.
9 He makes wars cease to the ends of the earth;
he breaks the bow and shatters the spear,
he burns the shields with fire.
10 "Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth."
11 The LORD Almighty is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress. Selah
So... Insha'allah... this will be a day that changes the nation of Afghanistan!
Obviously, the God that I serve and the god of the Muslim faith are 2 different realities, however, the heart attitude is still the same.
On the eve of the elections in Afghanistan, this mindset is so important. I cannot imagine what it would be like to weigh the opportunity to cast a vote, with the possibility that casting that vote could get you hurt or killed! How do you even begin to make that decision? I have been following the lead up to this election very closely! I am excited to see that the NATO forces are taking the Taliban threats so seriously. It is my prayer that the people of Afghanistan will feel the nations of the world standing up in protection as they enter polling stations. That their view of the ability of the Afghan police and Army to protect them will change. As they see others risking their lives to vote, I pray that they will feel how much we have invested in them. It is amazing that this is all happening on one day. The same day that NATO will halt its operations and focus on the safety of those who choose to invest in the political process.
Tyranny and oppression wants people isolated, uneducated and scared. But this day, this election-insha'allah- will provide an opportunity to for EACH afghan citizen to take back this moment of their lives. I pray with everything in me, that this day will be the beginning of a groundswell of national pride, and a renewed resolve to see thier nation healed and rebuilt.
There are so many complexities to this situation, and by no means do I seek to naively wade into the noise and offer trite solutions. I am, however, passionate about seeing the people of Afghanistan rise above all those who would oppress them. To find home-grown solutions to these major issues, to get fed up of being the punching bag of those who would exploit them. I have a vision of once again walking streets but this time, instead of a flack vest, I am carrying my child or my grand-child, showing where I have been. I want to freely explore the heritage and beauty of this nation that has so completely captured my heart! Like with anything that we love, I want the BEST!
So tonight our time, as people venture out into the uncertainty, my prayer is for safety, and for eyes that are open to all those who are sacrificing so much to assist, and it will renew in them a sense of nationhood and purpose.
PSALM 46 says:
1 God is our refuge and strength,
an ever-present help in trouble.
2 Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way
and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea,
3 though its waters roar and foam
and the mountains quake with their surging. Selah
4 There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God,
the holy place where the Most High dwells.
5 God is within her, she will not fall;
God will help her at break of day.
6 Nations are in uproar, kingdoms fall;
he lifts his voice, the earth melts.
7 The LORD Almighty is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress. Selah
8 Come and see the works of the LORD,
the desolations he has brought on the earth.
9 He makes wars cease to the ends of the earth;
he breaks the bow and shatters the spear,
he burns the shields with fire.
10 "Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth."
11 The LORD Almighty is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress. Selah
So... Insha'allah... this will be a day that changes the nation of Afghanistan!
Monday, August 10, 2009
Moving in Opposition
There are many times as Christans that we are called to do things opposite to what seems intuitive. Love your enemies, pray for those who persecute you.... if you have a need, give. The last shall be first. If you want to gain your life, you must lose it. Forgive those who hate you, turn the other cheek
There are many things in our Christian walks that seem to be contrary to what makes any sense, and so over time I have come to look beyond the details and see the bigger picture and see what else might be at stake. This principle was illustrated to me very clearly this week. I have been running. I have some goals and I have blogged about what my running has meant to me. 2 weeks ago, as we were achieving our biggest goal, just as we hit that mark, my knee started to twinge. Granted, I am not the youngest person around, and I work on my feet, so a twinge-y knee isn't that big of a surprise. But what happened next was.... I decided (wisely, I think) to take it easy on the knee. To give it some time to recover. Keep in mind that there was no injury or explainable event. For 2 weeks I have been icing it, and carefully walking on it-and missing my runs! I never thought I would be THAT person who was itching to get out running! But I didn't want to permanently damage anything.
I voiced my concerns to a friend who is no stranger to pain, and to working through that pain physically. He suggested-as a 'testosterone based life form' would-to power through the pain, "it's just a little wear and tear".
Having nothing to lose (and the last class of my running clinic being tonight) I decided to put this advice to the test. I was a little nervous about running for only the 2nd time in 2 weeks. I was worried about getting out on our run and then having to bail out, and walk home. And worse... as I drove to meet my running group my knee, which previously had been sore only in one spot, began to twinge in others, and then the other knee began to twinge, and then my wrist..... it was then that I realized that this was not what it seemed. I was sure that this was an attack. That the enemy was attempting to derail my progress. That in his desperate need to keep me from reaching my destiny, he had targeted the place of my biggest potential victory. As I was making this 'discovery' I realized that the last 2 weeks have been a quagmire of insecurities, and backward steps. That I was feeling defeated. I cannot do what God is calling me to without being able to run. Period. There is a vocational requirement to run, so I was being targeted for destruction.
As I sat contemplating this possibility, I knew that I had to take a gamble. I am tenacious enough to be able to power through the pain, yet I know that to run on an injury can make it worse. So I prayed. I declared that no weapon formed against me shall prosper, I declared that the lies I was getting bombarded with were not the truth, and I urgently prayed that God-the great Physician- would fix/protect/heal my knee if there was anything actually wrong with it. I know that He is big enough for all those things!
Long story short, I ran tonight, it was hard because I hadn't run that distance in a while, but the whole time I was running, my knee didn't hurt at all!
Sometimes the greatest struggle is just before the breakthrough.
There are many things in our Christian walks that seem to be contrary to what makes any sense, and so over time I have come to look beyond the details and see the bigger picture and see what else might be at stake. This principle was illustrated to me very clearly this week. I have been running. I have some goals and I have blogged about what my running has meant to me. 2 weeks ago, as we were achieving our biggest goal, just as we hit that mark, my knee started to twinge. Granted, I am not the youngest person around, and I work on my feet, so a twinge-y knee isn't that big of a surprise. But what happened next was.... I decided (wisely, I think) to take it easy on the knee. To give it some time to recover. Keep in mind that there was no injury or explainable event. For 2 weeks I have been icing it, and carefully walking on it-and missing my runs! I never thought I would be THAT person who was itching to get out running! But I didn't want to permanently damage anything.
I voiced my concerns to a friend who is no stranger to pain, and to working through that pain physically. He suggested-as a 'testosterone based life form' would-to power through the pain, "it's just a little wear and tear".
Having nothing to lose (and the last class of my running clinic being tonight) I decided to put this advice to the test. I was a little nervous about running for only the 2nd time in 2 weeks. I was worried about getting out on our run and then having to bail out, and walk home. And worse... as I drove to meet my running group my knee, which previously had been sore only in one spot, began to twinge in others, and then the other knee began to twinge, and then my wrist..... it was then that I realized that this was not what it seemed. I was sure that this was an attack. That the enemy was attempting to derail my progress. That in his desperate need to keep me from reaching my destiny, he had targeted the place of my biggest potential victory. As I was making this 'discovery' I realized that the last 2 weeks have been a quagmire of insecurities, and backward steps. That I was feeling defeated. I cannot do what God is calling me to without being able to run. Period. There is a vocational requirement to run, so I was being targeted for destruction.
As I sat contemplating this possibility, I knew that I had to take a gamble. I am tenacious enough to be able to power through the pain, yet I know that to run on an injury can make it worse. So I prayed. I declared that no weapon formed against me shall prosper, I declared that the lies I was getting bombarded with were not the truth, and I urgently prayed that God-the great Physician- would fix/protect/heal my knee if there was anything actually wrong with it. I know that He is big enough for all those things!
Long story short, I ran tonight, it was hard because I hadn't run that distance in a while, but the whole time I was running, my knee didn't hurt at all!
Sometimes the greatest struggle is just before the breakthrough.
Friday, July 31, 2009
Beautifully Heartbreaking!
As I look around me, I see that men don't know what society expects of them or what to expect of themselves. In casual conversations, and in heated debates, in heavy reading and light reading, I have seen a trend of late that shows me there is a great emptiness in the lives of men as they get mixed messages about what their roles are. The media denigrates men in so many ways, from commercials with stupid husbands, or sit-coms with overbearing wives, to movies that characterize men all too often as the bad guy. As a woman in this society, I have a strong desire to influence and inspire the men around me to be the best men that they can be. I see in the faces of friends' little boys the future superheros they aspire to. I see men every morning on their way to work getting their coffee for the day and I see in that, the desire to work hard for their families.
What I hear though from the men around me is confusion. Confusion in what they were raised to be and the pressure that they feel from society. Something as simple as holding open a door, young men often tell me that they feel like they want to and that it is the right thing to do but that they don't want to offend. I also see young women around me who treat themselves with a lack of respect that invites men down to their level and results in poor treatment ending in a reinforced view of men as the bad guys.
I came across this story and while it inspires me and it uplifts me to know that someone has taken pro-active steps, at the same time my heart breaks that this need...one that, 40 years ago might not even have existed, is so pervasive as to require such a program.
To all those seeking to invest in the lives of young men needing mentoring.... thank you!
(If you don't get a link on Facebook... here it is http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/living/2009/07/28/obrien.bia2.harveytown.cnn)
What I hear though from the men around me is confusion. Confusion in what they were raised to be and the pressure that they feel from society. Something as simple as holding open a door, young men often tell me that they feel like they want to and that it is the right thing to do but that they don't want to offend. I also see young women around me who treat themselves with a lack of respect that invites men down to their level and results in poor treatment ending in a reinforced view of men as the bad guys.
I came across this story and while it inspires me and it uplifts me to know that someone has taken pro-active steps, at the same time my heart breaks that this need...one that, 40 years ago might not even have existed, is so pervasive as to require such a program.
To all those seeking to invest in the lives of young men needing mentoring.... thank you!
(If you don't get a link on Facebook... here it is http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/living/2009/07/28/obrien.bia2.harveytown.cnn)
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Finding what you are looking for.
I have a confession to make.... I am slightly addicted to 2 dating shows. One is the Bachelorette, and the other is a new show that I have discovered..... Dating in the Dark. They are completly different in scope, in purpose and therefore in content.
Dating in the Dark is based on the question of whether people can 'fall in love' without seeing each others' faces. I use quotations because I think that it would be very difficult to truly fall in love on a reality show. On Dating in the Dark, the people meet in the dark and date in the dark, they get to know one another over a series of dates and then, following the 'big reveal' they have to choose whether or not to meet outside the house. The one twist is that they have all filled out questionnaires and have had experts match them to a specific person. There are choices throughout when they can choose who to 'date'. In the first episode, they all chose to focus primarily on the people that the experts chose, even given the opportunity to see any of the men.
It is interesting to think that the weight of an expert opinion can so greatly sway the impact of an encounter. Is it possible that we see what we are looking for? So often, when searching for someone special it is too easy to see all the reasons NOT to take a risk, to see all the flaws.... and imagine our surprise when we actually find these things....
On the other hand, The Bachelorette is all about what is perfect....until its not. Perfect settings, perfect dates, perfect men, and one imperfect girl.... sounds........... perfect! And yet, time after time, date after date, these men fail to impress, don't live up to the high expectations.
OK.. so what do we do with this? There are easy ties to dating and seeing the good in people, but what if there is a aspect to our relationship with God? I have noticed that of late, I have been having tougher time than I normally do seeing the 'good parts' of God. It is, all about what I have been choosing to see.
I suppose in this case, I am the Bachelorette, "HOPING" to find what I have it in my head that will make me happy in my relationship with God, when what I should be doing, is listening to the 'experts' who tell me how amazing God is and how He loves me! I need to use my head more to remember the truth of God, to focus on "whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." Phil 4:8
Dating in the Dark is based on the question of whether people can 'fall in love' without seeing each others' faces. I use quotations because I think that it would be very difficult to truly fall in love on a reality show. On Dating in the Dark, the people meet in the dark and date in the dark, they get to know one another over a series of dates and then, following the 'big reveal' they have to choose whether or not to meet outside the house. The one twist is that they have all filled out questionnaires and have had experts match them to a specific person. There are choices throughout when they can choose who to 'date'. In the first episode, they all chose to focus primarily on the people that the experts chose, even given the opportunity to see any of the men.
It is interesting to think that the weight of an expert opinion can so greatly sway the impact of an encounter. Is it possible that we see what we are looking for? So often, when searching for someone special it is too easy to see all the reasons NOT to take a risk, to see all the flaws.... and imagine our surprise when we actually find these things....
On the other hand, The Bachelorette is all about what is perfect....until its not. Perfect settings, perfect dates, perfect men, and one imperfect girl.... sounds........... perfect! And yet, time after time, date after date, these men fail to impress, don't live up to the high expectations.
OK.. so what do we do with this? There are easy ties to dating and seeing the good in people, but what if there is a aspect to our relationship with God? I have noticed that of late, I have been having tougher time than I normally do seeing the 'good parts' of God. It is, all about what I have been choosing to see.
I suppose in this case, I am the Bachelorette, "HOPING" to find what I have it in my head that will make me happy in my relationship with God, when what I should be doing, is listening to the 'experts' who tell me how amazing God is and how He loves me! I need to use my head more to remember the truth of God, to focus on "whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." Phil 4:8
Friday, July 17, 2009
Titles
You have, most likely heard of the idea that often the place of your greatest battle or fear is the place of greatest strength that God wants to use you. There are so many times in my life where I have dreaded looking behind the veil of that sentiment. I suppose that is the point of fear isn’t it? The enemies way of keeping us bound in exactly the areas that God has ordained for us to make the biggest impact. I have discovered as well, that sometimes things that start simply as fears, overtime can develop into a belief that we have about ourselves. I have had to face some of these beliefs lately. I have long desired to be in better shape. However, it is one of those things that you just can’t hope to have happen to you, it is something that you have to believe is possible for you and then put in the hours of work to get there. God has this interesting way of going about things!
2 years ago, somewhat suddenly, I was empowered, encouraged, and inspired to change my eating habits. Some of that journey is recorded in previous posts, and I could probably write for months abut that, it was totally God’s providential assistance that allowed me to complete that program. I have never before followed through on anything like that before. It had become a lie in my life that I wasn’t someone who could ‘stick to’ a diet or exercise regime, and in order to not feel the disappointment every time I failed, I bought into the lie that was one of those people who just couldn’t diet. Then God got a hold of me, overrode those beliefs supernaturally, and truly provided me all the tools I needed to overcome. Then I went away, to the desert in the middle of summer, I never thought I was someone who could live in the heat, but He forced my hand, and protected me. He took me places and had me experience things that were amazing.
For some of these experiences, I drew on my successes with weightloss to prove to myself that I could power through and follow through. The story of David, when he was going out to Goliath and spoke of his bear-killing history finishes with the assertion that “this will be like that”. David believed in God’s ability to deliver Goliath into his hands because there was a history. Then as time went on, and new amazing things were accomplished in God, those became the “bear” God had helped me kill!
Through all this, a call to fitness has been burning within me, only to flame out when I tried it alone. Then Ottawa Race weekend came along. Thousands and thousands and thousands of people participate! My roommate at the time, inspired me to sign up for the 5K. At the time of signing up, I was pretty sure that, if forced into it, I could walk 5km without dying, but I knew that I couldn’t run anywhere close to that distance. I was supposed to train, and practice, I had bought a treadmill that got very little use, by the time race weekend came along. As race day approached, I got more and more frustrated, annoyed and angry at myself for failing in this area once again. It was only because I made this commitment to my roommate, and she was going to be there to cheer me on (she was running a different distance) that I even went. Had she not driven me, I might have bailed.
Standing there, among thousands of people I felt like the biggest fraud. I fully expected at any moment, someone to point at me and race officials would come over and physically eject me from the race. I didn’t belong there among all those people… and it was hot…. And I didn’t have the right shoes…. And … and …..and
And then, I took a moment to list all the counter arguments for the lies that were chasing each other around my mind trying to shame me into giving in and giving up. The proofs I used were:
1) I PAID so just that entitled me to a spot at the start line
2) Hot? This isn’t hot… the dessert is Hot! I lived there, I can do this!
3) Right now, there are soldiers in Afghanistan who would LOVE to be able to opt out of the need to run 5K this afternoon, except with them, they have 80-100 pounds of gear… if they can do that, YOU can do this!
As the race started, I was still fighting all the emotions and all of the thoughts that would disqualify me from this accomplishment. As I crossed the START line I was chocking back tears, and the desire to sit and weep. Then the smiling face of my roommate appeared in the midst of the crowd, there she was cheering me on! And I started to run!
I would love to tell you that I ran like the wind, finished well, and am setting world records all over the world, but that is not really how it works, is it?
At the end of the course, everyone was given a medal, everyone! It is fun to say that I got a medal in my FIRST 5k! Only I need to know whole story!
On the way home, my roommate kept jokingly announcing to the cars around us that they needed to let us through because “she’s an athlete!” It is amazing what can happen in the spirit of someone when they buy into a ‘title change’. I had never thought of myself as athletic, and I certainly not ‘earned’ it. But I felt like, in that moment, God changed my title.
I have since joined a running club and loving getting out and running pushing myself further and seeing what I am capable of. I know that it is all about God’s provision and God working on the inside to change those titles I have given myself.
What titles have you called yourself that God wants to break off to bring you to the next level of your destiny?
2 years ago, somewhat suddenly, I was empowered, encouraged, and inspired to change my eating habits. Some of that journey is recorded in previous posts, and I could probably write for months abut that, it was totally God’s providential assistance that allowed me to complete that program. I have never before followed through on anything like that before. It had become a lie in my life that I wasn’t someone who could ‘stick to’ a diet or exercise regime, and in order to not feel the disappointment every time I failed, I bought into the lie that was one of those people who just couldn’t diet. Then God got a hold of me, overrode those beliefs supernaturally, and truly provided me all the tools I needed to overcome. Then I went away, to the desert in the middle of summer, I never thought I was someone who could live in the heat, but He forced my hand, and protected me. He took me places and had me experience things that were amazing.
For some of these experiences, I drew on my successes with weightloss to prove to myself that I could power through and follow through. The story of David, when he was going out to Goliath and spoke of his bear-killing history finishes with the assertion that “this will be like that”. David believed in God’s ability to deliver Goliath into his hands because there was a history. Then as time went on, and new amazing things were accomplished in God, those became the “bear” God had helped me kill!
Through all this, a call to fitness has been burning within me, only to flame out when I tried it alone. Then Ottawa Race weekend came along. Thousands and thousands and thousands of people participate! My roommate at the time, inspired me to sign up for the 5K. At the time of signing up, I was pretty sure that, if forced into it, I could walk 5km without dying, but I knew that I couldn’t run anywhere close to that distance. I was supposed to train, and practice, I had bought a treadmill that got very little use, by the time race weekend came along. As race day approached, I got more and more frustrated, annoyed and angry at myself for failing in this area once again. It was only because I made this commitment to my roommate, and she was going to be there to cheer me on (she was running a different distance) that I even went. Had she not driven me, I might have bailed.
Standing there, among thousands of people I felt like the biggest fraud. I fully expected at any moment, someone to point at me and race officials would come over and physically eject me from the race. I didn’t belong there among all those people… and it was hot…. And I didn’t have the right shoes…. And … and …..and
And then, I took a moment to list all the counter arguments for the lies that were chasing each other around my mind trying to shame me into giving in and giving up. The proofs I used were:
1) I PAID so just that entitled me to a spot at the start line
2) Hot? This isn’t hot… the dessert is Hot! I lived there, I can do this!
3) Right now, there are soldiers in Afghanistan who would LOVE to be able to opt out of the need to run 5K this afternoon, except with them, they have 80-100 pounds of gear… if they can do that, YOU can do this!
As the race started, I was still fighting all the emotions and all of the thoughts that would disqualify me from this accomplishment. As I crossed the START line I was chocking back tears, and the desire to sit and weep. Then the smiling face of my roommate appeared in the midst of the crowd, there she was cheering me on! And I started to run!
I would love to tell you that I ran like the wind, finished well, and am setting world records all over the world, but that is not really how it works, is it?
At the end of the course, everyone was given a medal, everyone! It is fun to say that I got a medal in my FIRST 5k! Only I need to know whole story!
On the way home, my roommate kept jokingly announcing to the cars around us that they needed to let us through because “she’s an athlete!” It is amazing what can happen in the spirit of someone when they buy into a ‘title change’. I had never thought of myself as athletic, and I certainly not ‘earned’ it. But I felt like, in that moment, God changed my title.
I have since joined a running club and loving getting out and running pushing myself further and seeing what I am capable of. I know that it is all about God’s provision and God working on the inside to change those titles I have given myself.
What titles have you called yourself that God wants to break off to bring you to the next level of your destiny?
Monday, July 06, 2009
Can it be true?
I cannot believe that one year ago today I was on a plane on my way to an incredible adventure. It is incredible to me what God is capable of bringing us through in such a short time! It is remarkable to think that no matter how I have felt, or what I wanted out of this experience, God stuck assertively to His better agenda for what needed to be accomplished in me!
I am excited for what is next.
I am excited for what is next.
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