Saturday, March 22, 2008

What about the Nails?

Every year at TLC we do an Easter Production called "The Nails". If you have ever heard the Easter story you know the general plot. TLC takes a little twist on the story to tell it from the perspective of the blacksmith who made the nails that Jesus was crucified with. It is dramatic and life-changing. I have played the same part for 3 years and every year, it has been a profound and amazing experience.

When you are in your 3rd year of playing the same role, the focus of energy moves away from remembering the lines, to finding depths beyond the words-finding a new way to communicate them. We perform it 3 times, and every time there is a different experience. God comes in and takes over and I feel the differences in the words and meanings. It is like God tailor makes each experience for each audience. We as the cast are just along for the ride.

The reason we do it, is ALWAYS about the lives that it will impact. ALWAYS. Occasionally, however, God somehow steps in and changes me in the process. I was, for some unknown reason, more nervous this year.... actually afraid is more accurate. I was afraid of saying the wrong lines, getting the scene mixed up... and a big source of my anxiety were my SHOES!!

I couldn't find any nice shoes that would compliment my outfit, and so I decided on a pair that were a gift, yet a bit too big. Being as high as they were and a bit too big, I was nervous about falling or stepping out of them onstage. Nothing happened, and my dignity is intact, but as I ponder about the shoes I realized that there is an underlying lesson to be had.

I found, more than other years, that I TRULY had to turn it all over to God. A few months ago, I had an incredible realization about the equipping of God. In a Joyce Meyer podcast, I was reminded so clearly that "what God calls you to, He also equips you for". Backstage, waiting for my cues, I would breath deeply and remind myself that everything was in God's hands. I was not responsible for the people's salvation, I was simply called to do my part.

The more focused I became on that reality the stronger I felt, and the more at peace I became. There are a few things that God is calling me to in the next season of my life where this truth needs to be drilled right down into the depths of my until it rests in the marrow of my bones. I will have no other option than to rely solely on the equipping of God.

This was a truth that needed to be embraced quickly because of the immediate and very public nature of what I was called to do, but it served as a wonderful reminder for everyday.

Stay tuned for more about the shoes!!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

As a child, my mother always bought my shoes 1/2 size too big - so that I could "grow into them." If they're too tight, there's no room to grow. :) You did an amazing job!