Fighting through

Today I participated in an event that I have wanted to do for a long time and yet never thought I had it in me. I did a 5km race. It was a big achievement-not from an athletic perspective, my time was horrible. Good thing that wasn't the point of today though. The point today was simply to show up and to finish.

Surprisingly, simply showing up was a battle that I didn't expect. I realized as I stood there waiting for the race to start that I was fighting this whole idea that I didn't belong and that given the fact that I wimped out on my training, I probably didn't even deserve this achievement.

As the race began, I actually began to cry as my iPod played Jonny Lang's "Only a Man". One verse of the song is an exchange between "the man" and God:

Man: I'll give you my burdens...
God: I'll give you peaced
Man:..all of my desires
God: ..... I'll give you what you need
Man:...what about these chains, Lord
God: I'll set you free
Man: But they're so heavy
God: Just lay them at my feet

Man: Just promise you won't leave me
God:I'll never leave
Man: So where do I go from here. Lord
God: Just follow me, just follow me

It was a beautiful reminder that no matter what the burdens, the lies I have believed about myself, or the limitations that I thought Iwould never overcome, all these things are chains that God has said He will take and deal with.

As the rest of the journey unfolded, God used the music on my iPod to motivate and speak to me about the truth of Who He is.

I am grateful to have a God who doesn't hold us ransom to our inadequacies.

I am also grateful for an amazing friend who cheered me on, and made her voice heard above the crowd to let me know she was proud of me! Thanks roommie!