God needs a tool to use to catch our attention. He needs to be able to put His finger on an area of our lives when He wants to walk us through the process of change and growth. As we know, there is always another side to everything in God. The enemy would seek to confuse us and tell us all our faults so that we merely feel condemned. How do we tell the difference?
We talk a lot about the conviction of God and the condemnation of the enemy. How do I tell the difference?
Here is what the Dictionary says:
convict1. to prove or declare guilty of an offense, esp. after a legal trial: to convict a prisoner of a felony. 2. to impress with a sense of guilt. –noun 3.a person proved or declared guilty of an offense.
con·dem·na·tion 1. The act of condemning. The state of being condemned. 2. Severe reproof; strong censure. 3. A reason or occasion for condemning.
When I look at the word "condemnation' it seems to carry with it an implication of value. When a building, for example, is condemned, it is no longer of value. It is beyond hope of repair and the only path to take is to tear the building down, it is considered a danger. A prisoner on their way to their execution is 'condemned'. This is contrasted with 'conviction' which is merely a statement of guilt or innocence. When a person is convicted, most often the plan for punishment also includes a plan for rehabilitation- there is hope for them still. This is a key to understanding the difference.
Jesus never shys away from identifying a guilty party. Look at the woman at the well, Peter, Judas, and the woman caught in adultery, Jesus doesn't overlook the sin in their lives, but His focus always was the way out. We can feel the weight of our guilt, but if it of God there is no condemnation.
Here's what the Bible says:
Romans 8:1 1There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.
John 3:17 ForGod did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.
As we process through the things that God puts His finger on, there is always HOPE, there is always mercy, and always forgiveness.
Monday, January 28, 2008
Am I condemned?
We have a lot that God can speak to us in our lives. As Christians there sometimes seems to be such high standards for our daily conduct that sometimes it can be overwhelming to meet them. There are also times when in our lives, a lot needs to change, and there are many aspect that God needs to speak to us about. He puts His finger on something, we try to deal with it and then on to the next thing.
Occasionally though, there are competing voices. In our vulnerability to be open to God's voice, we sometimes can be subjected to the competing voice of the one who would try to destroy us. In the midst of hearing from God about our opportunities for growth there can be a nagging, incidious voice that would mock our pain, lie to us about our future and remind us of the mistakes of the past.
Recently I have made a new friend, I am privileged to call this amazing woman my friend. She is a very new Christian and has a lot of questions. She is thirsty for the truth and wanting to be completely surrendered to God. As we began to speak about the things of God, it became clear that she was SO open to direction and promptings from God and those who are further along in the walk that she was getting tossed to and fro by the 'helpful' words of people around her. She rhymed off a laundry list of things that she needed to 'work on'. I could see on her face and hear in her words that she was feeling the condemnation of too much input from 'loving people'.
There is not a day that goes by that I am not confronted by the LONG detailed list of things that I want to address in my life, but the only way to get through the day and to be successful in what gets dealt with is to just focus on those things that GOD is calling me to focus on.
So how do we tell the difference? More next time.....
Thursday, January 24, 2008
What else can I say?
The Headline Reads "Canadian Killed", and once again, our collective hearts mourn. In the midst of this conflict, though, there IS hope:
"We are making the area more secure, more secure for us and more secure for Afghans, because the Taliban don't make the difference,"said Laroche, commander of Canada's military forces in Afghanistan.
"That's what Canadians are doing, and we won't stop helping the people of Afghanistan."
"That's what Canadians are doing, and we won't stop helping the people of Afghanistan."
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
This will be like that.....
I have posted a couple of times about the story of David, when he spoke to Saul before going against Goliath. He recalls his past achievements-killing a lion and a bear- and says to Saul "this will be like one of those"
As soon as I read that a couple of months ago, I KNEW that it was a significant scripture. I didn't know why or for what purpose, but I knew that it was going to be a changing scripture in my life.
I posted a couple of weeks ago about those experiences, and how I am going to 'enroll' in seminars on killing "bears" and "lions"because I know that there is a Goliath coming in my life that will go beyond my current experience, yet I need to have those experiences to draw on.
A plan is beginning to take shape, but the precursor to this is fitness.
I have begun to work out hardcore with the assistance of a well trained gym employee who has offered her services - and her friendship. In the course of a month and a half, I have gone from saying "I hate the gym" to lying in bed this morning, trying to find an excuse that would over-ride my desire to get up and go!! It is amazing when you begin to share an experience with someone, and you find that you can do much more than you ever thought possible. Somehow, a weight that I didn't think I could lift once, is too light at the end of 3 sets! It doesn't make sense. Each day is another piece of evidence that says... whatever God calls you to, He also equips you for. I can look back to yesterday and remember what I accomplished, and know that I am stronger today than I was yesterday, and I will be stronger tomorrow. The next weight level is another "this will be like that" moment.
Ultimately, I know that this is not a journey toward a weight-lifting title, it is more about the journey than the destination. I am enjoying though, the destruction of the lies of the enemy that have, for so long, kept me from seeing the fullness of my destiny.
Is there a "Goliath" in your life, that you need to be convinced, in God's power, you can overcome?
As soon as I read that a couple of months ago, I KNEW that it was a significant scripture. I didn't know why or for what purpose, but I knew that it was going to be a changing scripture in my life.
I posted a couple of weeks ago about those experiences, and how I am going to 'enroll' in seminars on killing "bears" and "lions"because I know that there is a Goliath coming in my life that will go beyond my current experience, yet I need to have those experiences to draw on.
A plan is beginning to take shape, but the precursor to this is fitness.
I have begun to work out hardcore with the assistance of a well trained gym employee who has offered her services - and her friendship. In the course of a month and a half, I have gone from saying "I hate the gym" to lying in bed this morning, trying to find an excuse that would over-ride my desire to get up and go!! It is amazing when you begin to share an experience with someone, and you find that you can do much more than you ever thought possible. Somehow, a weight that I didn't think I could lift once, is too light at the end of 3 sets! It doesn't make sense. Each day is another piece of evidence that says... whatever God calls you to, He also equips you for. I can look back to yesterday and remember what I accomplished, and know that I am stronger today than I was yesterday, and I will be stronger tomorrow. The next weight level is another "this will be like that" moment.
Ultimately, I know that this is not a journey toward a weight-lifting title, it is more about the journey than the destination. I am enjoying though, the destruction of the lies of the enemy that have, for so long, kept me from seeing the fullness of my destiny.
Is there a "Goliath" in your life, that you need to be convinced, in God's power, you can overcome?
Friday, January 18, 2008
Amazing Night
I had the most amazing night.....In celebration of my birthday this weekend, my mother treated myself and a couple of good friends to a hockey game. Not just any hockey game.... Canadian Forces Appreciation night!
4 of my biggest passions are: Family, friends, Hockey, and the Forces.... what an amazing way to celebrate my birthday! And we won!!
Any opportunity we have to honour those who are willing to do what our Forces do is so special.
Thursday, January 17, 2008
A Husband of My Own
As a single women, I am continually seeking a relationship with God that fills all the needs in my life. I seek Him in the morning for the strength and purpose for the day, I chat with Him throughout the day if I am lonely, have a question, or if He lays someone on my heart. I have learned that, in many situations, that there is ABSOLUTELY nothing that I can do to change the outcomes. Whether it is a friend in need who is making what I think is a poor choice, or the hurt of a friend going through a touch situation.
I really don't like the feeling that there is nothing that I can do to change things, but I know that God can do anything.
There is an intimacy with our relationship that I don't think has eve existed before, I want to do more, be more, and accomplish more for Him, in His strength.
The one thing that God cannot do.... GASP...... is change a tire!
I had a situation this weekend, where I had a completely flat tire, normally I would just call my roadside assistance, but I was on my way to host a 60th birthday party for my dad, and couldn't spare the time to wait! I was fighting the overwhelming feeling that was gathering, and trying to reassess the situation, when I received a phone call from a friend- I happened to be in line at the gas station to see if I could leave my car there for a few hours. I told him that I would be late to meet up with the group and explained the situation.
As we were leaving the gas station, one of the men in line a head of me, turned and said "can I change your tire for you?".
I was shocked that a complete stranger would make an offer like this! I was cold and he was likely on his way somewhere... I, of course, took him up on his offer and began to empty the trunk so that he could get at the spare and the jack. As I began to lift the stuff out of the trunk, he came around and said "let me do that for you, you guys go get warm!!!!" I am getting better at accepting assistance, but I still have a hard time not 'paying' for it by doing as much as I can to limit how much work people actually have to do! My friend Leah, who was with me, also had her car, and so we sat in her car, and got warm while this amazing man changed my tire!!!
As we sat there, watching this complete stranger go so completely out of his way for me, I was overwhelmed at how well God takes care of us! Although God normally doesn't change tires, He did conspire to have that man there, and have that phone call come in, so that I could be assisted... how amazing a husband is that??? He is truly everything that I need...
It is my prayer that this man who so generously bailed us out of trouble would be completely blessed beyond measure this week!
Monday, January 14, 2008
Lions and Bears!!
We all know David was a great king, a warrior and called of God. God anointed David at a young age to be King. We also know that David was a shepherd, he killed a lion and a bear, and then he killed Goliath. Before he went out to fight Goliath, he reminded Saul that he had killed a lion and a bear with his bare hands… he said Goliath “will be like one of those”. David’s faith in God’s ability to protect him came from a life of service to God and his family. While it is always remarkable when someone kills a lion with their bare hands, I wonder if actually killing a lion was really that remarkable. In our lives, where the we never encounter lions or bears, it would be News-worthy, yet, in David’s world, protecting sheep from lions and bears and other predators was part of the daily ‘grind’. While I don’t know in scripture, I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that all of David’s brothers had, at one time, killed a lion or a bear, perhaps it was part of the rights of passage, like a young man from a hunting family who bags his first deer!
We look to David’s life, and these events as pre-cursors if you will that show that God’s hand was on his life right from the beginning. We see the greatness in the stories and we all draw the conclusion together that these are “kingly” events. But wait, was it those events which qualified David to be King?
Let’s play a game of “what if?” What if, early in David’s life, he fell out of tree and broke his leg. In those days, he would have been left as a cripple, and not able to kill a lion, or a bear, or even Goliath… would that then have disqualified David from being God’s choice? Is the prerequisite for rule the killing of a giant, a bear and a lion? What about you and I? What about the calls of God that are in our lives that perhaps require skills of us that we have missed out on? We are all crippled in our own ways, life sends us challenges or disappointments that can seem to limit us from the call of God.
In my life, I see the times when I wanted to be able to slay the lion, yet I was held back by my fear of the sheep! I couldn't even do the day to day work that would have opened the door to the greatness of God’s calling.
Does this disqualify me? NOPE! I am realizing though, that I might just have to take a few steps backward and attend some lion killing classes! Then there is the seminar on what to do when a bear comes around! Only when I master those skills can I step into the fullness of what God has. Obviously I am speaking metaphorically! I don’t know exactly what these classes are going to look like, but I am excited!
We look to David’s life, and these events as pre-cursors if you will that show that God’s hand was on his life right from the beginning. We see the greatness in the stories and we all draw the conclusion together that these are “kingly” events. But wait, was it those events which qualified David to be King?
Let’s play a game of “what if?” What if, early in David’s life, he fell out of tree and broke his leg. In those days, he would have been left as a cripple, and not able to kill a lion, or a bear, or even Goliath… would that then have disqualified David from being God’s choice? Is the prerequisite for rule the killing of a giant, a bear and a lion? What about you and I? What about the calls of God that are in our lives that perhaps require skills of us that we have missed out on? We are all crippled in our own ways, life sends us challenges or disappointments that can seem to limit us from the call of God.
In my life, I see the times when I wanted to be able to slay the lion, yet I was held back by my fear of the sheep! I couldn't even do the day to day work that would have opened the door to the greatness of God’s calling.
Does this disqualify me? NOPE! I am realizing though, that I might just have to take a few steps backward and attend some lion killing classes! Then there is the seminar on what to do when a bear comes around! Only when I master those skills can I step into the fullness of what God has. Obviously I am speaking metaphorically! I don’t know exactly what these classes are going to look like, but I am excited!
Saturday, January 12, 2008
Oh what a night!!!
There is so much that is amazing about living in community with one another. Recently, I have been taking a group of single women in our church through a study of a book called “Lady-In-Waiting”. It is an amazing book wrapped in the principles of the story of Ruth. It’s focus is on becoming the woman that God wants us to be. As we shared together, grew together and even cried a little together, it was so amazing to see the relationships that came about from this experience. Between 2 events, our entire group spent New Year’s together-what a special treasure to have friends that you can celebrate with.
We wrapped up our time together with a night of Blessing. We invited some amazing “Titus 2” women who would pray and pour into the women. As a group, we were awestruck at the goodness of God, that He would speak to each of the women in such a personal and loving way.
A very unexpected thing came about as a result of this evening. As we were listening to what God would say to each woman, I realized how much I knew about each of the womens’ longings, and desires, and their relationship with God. This is significant because, for the most part, I have known these ladies less than 1 year, yet, I was able to, as they were being spoken to, acknowledge how ‘on’ each word was. What an amazing thing. It made me realize, once again, that longevity doesn’t always equal intimacy, there are people that I have known for years, yet wouldn’t have been able to say the same things!
This is what comes from “doing life together”. There is a quote that says “A friend is someone who you have fun with no matter the activity, but an acquaintance requires an event.”
This is so true, I have friends who I could sit with in an empty room for a couple of hours and say “that was fun”! It is all about Who they are not what we are doing together! I am so happy to have found more ‘friends’! I love it!
We wrapped up our time together with a night of Blessing. We invited some amazing “Titus 2” women who would pray and pour into the women. As a group, we were awestruck at the goodness of God, that He would speak to each of the women in such a personal and loving way.
A very unexpected thing came about as a result of this evening. As we were listening to what God would say to each woman, I realized how much I knew about each of the womens’ longings, and desires, and their relationship with God. This is significant because, for the most part, I have known these ladies less than 1 year, yet, I was able to, as they were being spoken to, acknowledge how ‘on’ each word was. What an amazing thing. It made me realize, once again, that longevity doesn’t always equal intimacy, there are people that I have known for years, yet wouldn’t have been able to say the same things!
This is what comes from “doing life together”. There is a quote that says “A friend is someone who you have fun with no matter the activity, but an acquaintance requires an event.”
This is so true, I have friends who I could sit with in an empty room for a couple of hours and say “that was fun”! It is all about Who they are not what we are doing together! I am so happy to have found more ‘friends’! I love it!
Tuesday, January 08, 2008
Still sick!
I can't believe that it is already the 8th!!! There is a lot going on, but not much to tell so I haven't really been able to post-that and I am still ill. I have no idea what is going on, but it is taking everything I have just to get through the day!
I tell you that so that you don't think that I have abandoned my blog.....
I tell you that so that you don't think that I have abandoned my blog.....
Saturday, January 05, 2008
Happy New Year
What can you say at the beginning of a new year, a clean slate, yet one where the echos-both good and bad- from the last year, still reverberate in your ears? I am not even sure how to approach this new year. I feel like I need to put the whole world on pause for a month or two and just process what God did in my life last year, and to gain some focus for this year. But obviously that isn't going to happen.
I am still a woman without a direction..... I have purpose and hopes yet I am waiting on God to point to the next step. There are things that I want to accomplish this year, but mostly I just want MORE.... MORE of God, more intimacy with Him. I had planned to start the year with fasting and prayer, and I got a good start but then my body melted down... almost literally. The back pain was so bad, that I didn't even realize that I had bronchitis- although I did wonder how back pain causes a fever! I got medication for the back and it revealed the level of the other illness.
I suppose that can be a metaphor for life, right? We get so caught up in the debilitating pain of what we think God has "done to us" or at the very least "allowed" in our lives that we can miss the reality that we are choking on something else entirely!
I don't think that it is a coincidence that I got sooo sick the same week I had planned to fast. I have found a few times recently that when I feel like God is planning something big, and I am intentional about getting alongside what God is doing, that I will randomly get sick. When I say randomly..... I mean RANDOMLY! I few months ago, everything was great... feeling good, the morning of the encounter weekend, I woke up with a mild fever and a weak feeling. I was determined to be there because I knew what God was going to be doing, so I persevered. I am hesitant to give the enemy too much credit, however, I do think that we need to be alert to his schemes.
I have a sense that this year is going to be huge.. another level of what God did last year. There is an urgency I can't quite explain. Like even now on the 4th of January, I see that in a few weeks it will be Easter, and then May, and then all of a sudden I know that we will be facing another Winter. It is strange that this sense of urgency is combined with a willingness to invest the time into getting something right. If it takes 3 months for the next step, than that is how long it will take. I don't feel like it is a long time. I am not explaining this well.....
I have a feeling that by the end of January there will be a lot more clarity, and that there is something major coming in March.
Hold on tight, it's gonna a 'fun'!!!
I am still a woman without a direction..... I have purpose and hopes yet I am waiting on God to point to the next step. There are things that I want to accomplish this year, but mostly I just want MORE.... MORE of God, more intimacy with Him. I had planned to start the year with fasting and prayer, and I got a good start but then my body melted down... almost literally. The back pain was so bad, that I didn't even realize that I had bronchitis- although I did wonder how back pain causes a fever! I got medication for the back and it revealed the level of the other illness.
I suppose that can be a metaphor for life, right? We get so caught up in the debilitating pain of what we think God has "done to us" or at the very least "allowed" in our lives that we can miss the reality that we are choking on something else entirely!
I don't think that it is a coincidence that I got sooo sick the same week I had planned to fast. I have found a few times recently that when I feel like God is planning something big, and I am intentional about getting alongside what God is doing, that I will randomly get sick. When I say randomly..... I mean RANDOMLY! I few months ago, everything was great... feeling good, the morning of the encounter weekend, I woke up with a mild fever and a weak feeling. I was determined to be there because I knew what God was going to be doing, so I persevered. I am hesitant to give the enemy too much credit, however, I do think that we need to be alert to his schemes.
I have a sense that this year is going to be huge.. another level of what God did last year. There is an urgency I can't quite explain. Like even now on the 4th of January, I see that in a few weeks it will be Easter, and then May, and then all of a sudden I know that we will be facing another Winter. It is strange that this sense of urgency is combined with a willingness to invest the time into getting something right. If it takes 3 months for the next step, than that is how long it will take. I don't feel like it is a long time. I am not explaining this well.....
I have a feeling that by the end of January there will be a lot more clarity, and that there is something major coming in March.
Hold on tight, it's gonna a 'fun'!!!
Thursday, December 27, 2007
A little at a time
At the end of each year, I have compiled my Blog posts into one big document so that if something happens with the website, or just so that I can see the sum total of my effort.
To date, my blog entries make up 151 pages at 12 point font and contain 63310 words! Isn't that crazy. I suppose that it just goes to show you what can be done with consistency. Many blog posts are less than a page.
I am working on a project where I will need to choose 2 or 3 of the 'best'from this year.....
Any suggestions?
To date, my blog entries make up 151 pages at 12 point font and contain 63310 words! Isn't that crazy. I suppose that it just goes to show you what can be done with consistency. Many blog posts are less than a page.
I am working on a project where I will need to choose 2 or 3 of the 'best'from this year.....
Any suggestions?
Amazing God
We serve an amazing God!
For Christmas I recieved the BBC's Series called Planet Earth. It is amazingly shot and beautifully put together. There are stories of animals that I didn't even know existed!!!
While watching each episode, I am amazed by the creativity and overwhelming plan of our Creator. I am reminded that He takes care of all of our needs.
For Christmas I recieved the BBC's Series called Planet Earth. It is amazingly shot and beautifully put together. There are stories of animals that I didn't even know existed!!!
While watching each episode, I am amazed by the creativity and overwhelming plan of our Creator. I am reminded that He takes care of all of our needs.
Monday, December 24, 2007
Just for Fun
So I have been asked a number of times this year about who I would like to smooch under the mistle-toe. I always have a hard time choosing, because I am not one to smooch just anyone. Lori asked for ONE person but, since its Christmas, and its MY BLOG, and I make the rules... AND because there is no one in my life to offend with this, I have a LIST (plus I couldn't just pick one.... the world is my Oyster. Enjoy
All of them are my favourites for different reasons and in different seasons...
I will let you figure out which one I am referring to here!!
A delectible selection don't you think??? Hope, I KNOW that you like the baldies!
In doing this exercise, I may have discovered something about my "type" I didnt think that I had one, but... maybe I do!! I am sure that there are many many many who should be on this list but who have escaped my thinking but this is a good start!!
If it was....
If you knew this was going to be your last Christmas, what would be most important aspects that you would insist were present? What about if you knew someone you loved wouldn't celebrate another? What then?
I suppose it is a melancholy question for such a wonderful time of year, however, we are a nation involved in conflicts around the world, and not everyone has the luxury of oblivious abandon assuming that this is going to be like every other Christmas, and that there will be many more.
Statistics would likely tell us that at least one of the people who reads this post will experience some sort of loss between now and Christmas 2008. I wonder, as we go into this day, would you be happy with the memories you made?
This hits particularly close to home this year as a few people I know are preparing to deploy to Afghanistan next August, the reality is that they will not be home next Christmas, and as hard as we pray, and as much as we hope, it is also possible that this could be their last Christmas. I wonder if they are doing anything differently this year? A friend of mine told me that his whole family was going to be away this Christmas, it wasn't until later that I wondered if there was more to this trip than just a 'change of pace'.
I ask this not to put a damper on your Christmas celebrations, rather it is my hope that this sobering thought will make you stop for a moment and appreciate all that you have right now.
I challenge you, make a memory this Christmas, one that would be enough to get you through forever.... I would wager a guess that what makes those types of memories is not as much about what sits UNDER the tree, as WHO sits around it.
If you or someone you know is deployed... know my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family!
I suppose it is a melancholy question for such a wonderful time of year, however, we are a nation involved in conflicts around the world, and not everyone has the luxury of oblivious abandon assuming that this is going to be like every other Christmas, and that there will be many more.
Statistics would likely tell us that at least one of the people who reads this post will experience some sort of loss between now and Christmas 2008. I wonder, as we go into this day, would you be happy with the memories you made?
This hits particularly close to home this year as a few people I know are preparing to deploy to Afghanistan next August, the reality is that they will not be home next Christmas, and as hard as we pray, and as much as we hope, it is also possible that this could be their last Christmas. I wonder if they are doing anything differently this year? A friend of mine told me that his whole family was going to be away this Christmas, it wasn't until later that I wondered if there was more to this trip than just a 'change of pace'.
I ask this not to put a damper on your Christmas celebrations, rather it is my hope that this sobering thought will make you stop for a moment and appreciate all that you have right now.
I challenge you, make a memory this Christmas, one that would be enough to get you through forever.... I would wager a guess that what makes those types of memories is not as much about what sits UNDER the tree, as WHO sits around it.
If you or someone you know is deployed... know my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family!
Sunday, December 23, 2007
p.s. I KNOW you!
There are few things that render me speechless, one of those things is an intensely emotional experience. Occasionally a movie will be so profound in its emotional storyline, that I need time to process it before I can speak about it. There are those experiences that make you feel like you want to go home, curl up in bed and just cry because you have spent the last few hours holding in the depth of emotions because one just doesn't blubber in public. I had one of those experiences today, I went to see P.S. I Love You. Watch the movie trailer and you will get a pretty good idea about the story.
I usually avoid girly movies like the plague, I find that they are not good for my heart, especially 2 days before Christmas!! I don't need to see another Hollywoodized story about 2 people falling in love. I much prefer the simplicity of men blowing stuff up and saving the world in the process! Somehow though, I found myself agreeing to go with a friend who desperately wanted to see it. The premise of the story is that a woman's husband dies, and after his death she begins to receive letters from him that he has preplanned that walk her through the grieving process and encourage her to get back into life. They are all signed PS, I love you!
Knowing that this might be a hard movie to watch, I began to pray, I prayed that my heart would not be pierced, and that I would be able to see the beauty in the story and hear from God about His love for me and to enjoy the story without taking it home with me- after all its just a movie.
I immediately had an amazing peace about the whole thing-and a realization. I realized that for the last 6 months or so, God has, essentially been walking me through a process of changing my life. Every once in a while, I find myself in obedience, doing something that I never thought I would do, something that God has called me to do. I have been walking this path of rediscovering what life should be, and more than that, WHO God is. In this process there have been moments of grieving the life that I knew, in order to step into what's next; and moments of extreme exhileration as I take on a new challenge; and there are moments of uncertainty but faith in the plan of God. Each of these emotions are encapsulated in the movie. I have never lost a spouse to death, nor have I ever truly fallen in love, but I caught glimpses of my life within the context of the storyline.
There was also a whisper in my ear that He has written me love letters, and He speaks and guides us through. Oftentimes, what hurts the most about being single is not feeling KNOWN, I suppose that the best love stories include some element of KNOWING one another at a level that leaves the rest of the world out......
BUT GOD....
He knows me, there is none who can know me more totally than God.
There were a few points in the story that made me want to blubber, because they were good points in the story, but there were a few moments that were just for me from God.... I just know it.
One of the lines in one of the letters reads something like "When you don't see the best of you, try seeing you through my eyes", wow, imagine if we could see ourselves through God's eyes.
In another scene, she has to sing Karaoke (it's in the trailer) and when she gets up to sing we look over her shoulder into the audience, and the crowd is gone, replaced in her mind with him, just him and she sings just to him. I want so much for EVERYTHING that I do, to be for an audience of One. When you know that someone knows you completely, and it totally on your side, and when you know that your vulnerabilities are safe with them, not only do I think that is the truest love, but I think that you can accomplish ANYTHING....
I suppose that the only One who can completely know us is God, He is the only One who is totally on our side, and only in His hands are we absolutely safe. So, I suppose He is the only choice that makes any sense at all!
I usually avoid girly movies like the plague, I find that they are not good for my heart, especially 2 days before Christmas!! I don't need to see another Hollywoodized story about 2 people falling in love. I much prefer the simplicity of men blowing stuff up and saving the world in the process! Somehow though, I found myself agreeing to go with a friend who desperately wanted to see it. The premise of the story is that a woman's husband dies, and after his death she begins to receive letters from him that he has preplanned that walk her through the grieving process and encourage her to get back into life. They are all signed PS, I love you!
Knowing that this might be a hard movie to watch, I began to pray, I prayed that my heart would not be pierced, and that I would be able to see the beauty in the story and hear from God about His love for me and to enjoy the story without taking it home with me- after all its just a movie.
I immediately had an amazing peace about the whole thing-and a realization. I realized that for the last 6 months or so, God has, essentially been walking me through a process of changing my life. Every once in a while, I find myself in obedience, doing something that I never thought I would do, something that God has called me to do. I have been walking this path of rediscovering what life should be, and more than that, WHO God is. In this process there have been moments of grieving the life that I knew, in order to step into what's next; and moments of extreme exhileration as I take on a new challenge; and there are moments of uncertainty but faith in the plan of God. Each of these emotions are encapsulated in the movie. I have never lost a spouse to death, nor have I ever truly fallen in love, but I caught glimpses of my life within the context of the storyline.
There was also a whisper in my ear that He has written me love letters, and He speaks and guides us through. Oftentimes, what hurts the most about being single is not feeling KNOWN, I suppose that the best love stories include some element of KNOWING one another at a level that leaves the rest of the world out......
BUT GOD....
He knows me, there is none who can know me more totally than God.
There were a few points in the story that made me want to blubber, because they were good points in the story, but there were a few moments that were just for me from God.... I just know it.
One of the lines in one of the letters reads something like "When you don't see the best of you, try seeing you through my eyes", wow, imagine if we could see ourselves through God's eyes.
In another scene, she has to sing Karaoke (it's in the trailer) and when she gets up to sing we look over her shoulder into the audience, and the crowd is gone, replaced in her mind with him, just him and she sings just to him. I want so much for EVERYTHING that I do, to be for an audience of One. When you know that someone knows you completely, and it totally on your side, and when you know that your vulnerabilities are safe with them, not only do I think that is the truest love, but I think that you can accomplish ANYTHING....
I suppose that the only One who can completely know us is God, He is the only One who is totally on our side, and only in His hands are we absolutely safe. So, I suppose He is the only choice that makes any sense at all!
P.S..........
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Global Warming???
Really???
We have had MORE snow this winter already than we had ALL season last year. Here are some pictures of the aftermath of a major storm...
This is my car......
This is my roommate's car
Monday, December 17, 2007
But I thought this was it!
I often get asked the question "How do I know if what I heard was from God or if it was just me?" There are so many circumstances in our lives where in the moment we are certain we "heard from God", and sometimes these things work out and sometimes they don't. When they don't, we just assume that we didn't hear from God.
This summer I had 2 situations in my life, major life-changing situations where I KNEW I heard from God. These were the types of situations where real things were at stake. Those scary moments where the trajectory of your life can change dramatically, and you really don't want to get it wrong.
One of the situations didn't resolve itself in the way that I thought it would based on what I thought I heard, and by proxy, I assumed that I also hadn't heard from God on what really is the more important situation. It threw me into a spin unlike anything I have ever experienced. Talk about a shaking of my faith. Not my faith in God, but my faith in my ability to hear from God-and HONEY! If you shake my faith in my ability to hear from God, I am sunk. Imagine Peter standing on the gunwhale of the boat, preparing to step onto the water and he wonders "what if that isn't Jesus?"
In talking about the suddnelies of God Jay talked about the time in between the promise and the fulfillment. But lets back it up one more step..... how do I know if what I think is from the Lord, and is it a PROMISE???
We have all heard the story that Katie Holmes knew somewhere deep in her heart that she would marry Tom Cruise one day. When they were preparing to get married, this was a romantic tidbit that got everyone's heart pumping, and we all were inspired to dream a little bigger- which is good. But what about the other 100 million women of all ages who have had that same thought (most of them are now singing "some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers!), but for whom that obviously didn't come true? If these were Christians, would we say that all the other women didn't hear from God?
In Ottawa there is a certain Christian, single, hockey player who is well known, and at some point in EVERY conversation with every single chrisitan woman, this name comes up, and most of the time if a married friend (usually a husband of a married friend) asks about prospects for me, this person's name ALWAYS comes up. There are literally thousands of women and hundreds of Christian woman who are CONVINCED that they are this guy's future wife. They obviously can't all be right...(Besides, we have claimed him for my friend so the rest can just back off!!)... but they ALL think that they heard from God.
This is just one example of this dilemma. So if we are to base our hope on the promise of God for our lives, how can we know that we know that we know that we have heard from Him in the first place?
This summer I had 2 situations in my life, major life-changing situations where I KNEW I heard from God. These were the types of situations where real things were at stake. Those scary moments where the trajectory of your life can change dramatically, and you really don't want to get it wrong.
One of the situations didn't resolve itself in the way that I thought it would based on what I thought I heard, and by proxy, I assumed that I also hadn't heard from God on what really is the more important situation. It threw me into a spin unlike anything I have ever experienced. Talk about a shaking of my faith. Not my faith in God, but my faith in my ability to hear from God-and HONEY! If you shake my faith in my ability to hear from God, I am sunk. Imagine Peter standing on the gunwhale of the boat, preparing to step onto the water and he wonders "what if that isn't Jesus?"
In talking about the suddnelies of God Jay talked about the time in between the promise and the fulfillment. But lets back it up one more step..... how do I know if what I think is from the Lord, and is it a PROMISE???
We have all heard the story that Katie Holmes knew somewhere deep in her heart that she would marry Tom Cruise one day. When they were preparing to get married, this was a romantic tidbit that got everyone's heart pumping, and we all were inspired to dream a little bigger- which is good. But what about the other 100 million women of all ages who have had that same thought (most of them are now singing "some of God's greatest gifts are unanswered prayers!), but for whom that obviously didn't come true? If these were Christians, would we say that all the other women didn't hear from God?
In Ottawa there is a certain Christian, single, hockey player who is well known, and at some point in EVERY conversation with every single chrisitan woman, this name comes up, and most of the time if a married friend (usually a husband of a married friend) asks about prospects for me, this person's name ALWAYS comes up. There are literally thousands of women and hundreds of Christian woman who are CONVINCED that they are this guy's future wife. They obviously can't all be right...(Besides, we have claimed him for my friend so the rest can just back off!!)... but they ALL think that they heard from God.
This is just one example of this dilemma. So if we are to base our hope on the promise of God for our lives, how can we know that we know that we know that we have heard from Him in the first place?
Faith and Hope
Today we had an amazing service despite the brutal weather! Jay preached an amazing message about the suddenlies of God. If there is anything in your life that you are waiting for... download it!
One of the thoughts was about faith, hope, and love.
I got thinking, what is the difference between faith and hope?
The biggest deferred dream of my heart, as you already know, is that of a spouse and family of my own. In the meantime, though, I am working hard to seek first the kingdom of God, and to find a place of contentment. As with anything that you are waiting for, there is a tension between the anticipation, and not letting what is not yet, distract you from what is now. God has a purpose for each day and if we are seduced by the idea of what will happen tomorrow, we will not learn what we need to learn today, and we miss out on so many things in the now. So we walk this tightrope of hope.... or is it faith?
Sometimes in this battle to find the middle ground, I can be very hard on myself. I think sometimes that if there continues to be hope in what is ahead that it means that I am not content in the now. So I have been working to discipline my mind to stay in the now... except it is crippling my ability to dream big dreams but when I dream big dreams... they include the things that I am hoping for.
All that to say that sometimes high hopes can be misinterpreted as lack of faith! Does that make any sense? Almost like, if I trusted God fully, I wouldn't have the need to rely on the hope.
This is one of those things that is going to twist me around for a few days.
Here's the question then....
what is the difference between faith and hope? and how do you balance the two?
One of the thoughts was about faith, hope, and love.
I got thinking, what is the difference between faith and hope?
The biggest deferred dream of my heart, as you already know, is that of a spouse and family of my own. In the meantime, though, I am working hard to seek first the kingdom of God, and to find a place of contentment. As with anything that you are waiting for, there is a tension between the anticipation, and not letting what is not yet, distract you from what is now. God has a purpose for each day and if we are seduced by the idea of what will happen tomorrow, we will not learn what we need to learn today, and we miss out on so many things in the now. So we walk this tightrope of hope.... or is it faith?
Sometimes in this battle to find the middle ground, I can be very hard on myself. I think sometimes that if there continues to be hope in what is ahead that it means that I am not content in the now. So I have been working to discipline my mind to stay in the now... except it is crippling my ability to dream big dreams but when I dream big dreams... they include the things that I am hoping for.
All that to say that sometimes high hopes can be misinterpreted as lack of faith! Does that make any sense? Almost like, if I trusted God fully, I wouldn't have the need to rely on the hope.
This is one of those things that is going to twist me around for a few days.
Here's the question then....
what is the difference between faith and hope? and how do you balance the two?
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Like Arsenic
Tonight, I was watching the movie "Amazing Grace" about the British Parliamentarian who worked hard to abolish the slave trade. There was one scene that really caught my heart. Early on in the movie, one of the characters staked a slave in a poker game. Wilberforce was disgusted and walked away from the money he had played already, refusing to be party to such conduct.
As he stepped outside, one of his friends followed and asked about his reaction saying "you've seen slavery before" and Wilberforce's response was "yes, but like arsenic every small dose doubles the effect".
My immediate thought was, "OH God, make that true in my life, that every small dose of something that is repugnant in Your sight has double the negative on my life each time I encounter it."
If we had that response, it wouldn't take long before we stand up and fight for that which is reprehensible to God. I would deal much more ruthlessly with the sin in my life. I want the sin in my heart, and the poor choices I make, to cause illness in my soul, so that there would come a change. It is only when we truly experience sin's stench that we cut it out of our lives.
As he stepped outside, one of his friends followed and asked about his reaction saying "you've seen slavery before" and Wilberforce's response was "yes, but like arsenic every small dose doubles the effect".
My immediate thought was, "OH God, make that true in my life, that every small dose of something that is repugnant in Your sight has double the negative on my life each time I encounter it."
If we had that response, it wouldn't take long before we stand up and fight for that which is reprehensible to God. I would deal much more ruthlessly with the sin in my life. I want the sin in my heart, and the poor choices I make, to cause illness in my soul, so that there would come a change. It is only when we truly experience sin's stench that we cut it out of our lives.
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
Kings....
1 Samuel 15:17 & 18; 22-23 (English Standard Version)
17And Samuel said, "Though you are little in your own eyes, are you not the head of the tribes of Israel? The LORD anointed you king over Israel. 18And the LORD sent you on a mission and said
22And Samuel said, "Has the LORD as great delight in burnt offerings and sacrifices, as in obeying the voice of the LORD? Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice, and to listen than the fat of rams.23For rebellion is as the sin of divination, and presumption is as iniquity and idolatry.Because you have rejected the word of the LORD, he has also rejected you from being king."
In this passage, Samuel is speaking to Saul. He exhorts Saul to think on a bigger scale. Saul knows that he is the King, yet he fails to act like a king. Is it possible that we are called by God to be kings? We are joint-heirs with the King of Kings, last time I checked that makes us kings and queens.
Is my vision too small?? What has God called me to conquer? What authority have I been given that I have failed to claim? How sad would it be to get to heaven, and have God say, you had the authority to conquer, and yet all you did was to play the part. You didn’t step into the fullness.
The Bible says that we have the authority to cast out demons…. Why are those around me still subject to the bondage of addiction?
The Bible says that we have the authority to speak to mountains and they will be made low…. Why are there mountain ranges in my way called debt, and disease, and bitterness?
The Bible says that we can speak to the blind and they will see, the deaf will hear and the lame will walk… why do family members still not believe, they are blind to God’s love, deaf to His words, and limping from the weapons of the enemy?
What is it going to take for me to stand in the authority that God has given me?
Do you think of yourself as a King?
Do you have a King's purpose?
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